cinepro wrote:JonasS wrote:Can you all help me? I think I am emotionally ok. My health is much better. However I may not be scripturally or doctrinally prepared and I do have a bad habit of being controversial at church. Also since I expressed to bishop that I would like to prepare I have had temptations to do things I know I shouldn't. Normally I do wrong things because I want to but I don't want to anymore and I was ok for a while but lately it has been aghhhh. Haha. Perhaps coincidence.
If you don't mind me asking, why do you think you might want to serve a mission? What would you hope to get out of it, or accomplish?
As the Church has finally realized (and implemented), missions aren't for everyone.
I am not here to defend myself. Please don't make me feel as though I have to.
When I was younger and knew little about the church, I had wanted to be a missionary whn I became older but I lost that desire when I lost the feminist views I had and wanted a family more than anything. I have leaned that I don't need to get married straight away. And that there will be time for such things in my life. The last few months has been like a seed growing. I am not sure why, but I had a desire to go on a mission and the desire grew. I read my patriarchal blessing which talked about serving whether on a mission or at home and I thought yes perhaps this is what I am to do. But Not really quite sure after that. I decided then to seek answers in the scriptures and before I looked through them a page caught my eye so I read and it said if ye have desires to serve God then ye are called to the work. I thought about that and asked my self, am I desireing to go on a mission or desireing to serve God. I don't fully know what it means to serve God and if a mission trully is serving Him. Or why exactly I feel this need inside me to prepare. And then some random person asked me if I was planning on going on a mission and I asked why he thought that and he said he can see it in me. I just took this as a coincidence. But there have been a few. And no one had said that to me before having the desire. I am scared and think it would be aweful but I also think there is something God wants me to learn and also to teach others. I am feeling prompted to prepare. Perhaps I am not supposed to go on a mission but I know for sure I am to prepare for a mission.