God was Sorry

[Dr. Shades]

If you believe the Book of Mormon then you have to believe they did. Limhi’s people encountered their remains, Coriantumr found the Mulekites and lived with them for nine months, etc.

No Jaredites in the Americas, no Book of Mormon.

Why do I have to believe that?

It's not even established that they landed in the Americas.

You're pretty new to Mormonism, aren't you?

The Angel Moroni told Joseph Smith that there was a record containing a history of the people of "this continent," i.e. the one Joseph Smith was in, i.e. the Americas. Nephi was shown in vision the seed of his brethren being scattered by the Gentiles. The Book of Mormon says that the Lamanites are among the ancestors of the American Indians.

As I said before, the last Jaredite lived among the people described in the Book of Mormon, and the search party sent out by the people of Limhi encountered the remains of the Jaredite civilization. Plus Mosiah translated the plates left behind by the last Jaredite prophet.

You ought to read the Book of Mormon sometime. It'll make it abundantly clear that the Jaredite barges were sea ships, not space ships. . . not to mention the fact that rocket technology wasn't available c. 2,000 years before Christ.

[Valo]

Why do I have to believe that?

It's not even established that they landed in the Americas.

You're pretty new to Mormonism, aren't you?

The Angel Moroni told Joseph Smith that there was a record containing a history of the people of "this continent," i.e. the one Joseph Smith was in, i.e. the Americas. Nephi was shown in vision the seed of his brethren being scattered by the Gentiles. The Book of Mormon says that the Lamanites are among the ancestors of the American Indians.

As I said before, the last Jaredite lived among the people described in the Book of Mormon, and the search party sent out by the people of Limhi encountered the remains of the Jaredite civilization. Plus Mosiah translated the plates left behind by the last Jaredite prophet.

You ought to read the Book of Mormon sometime. It'll make it abundantly clear that the Jaredite barges were sea ships, not space ships. . . not to mention the fact that rocket technology wasn't available c. 2,000 years before Christ.

No, that's not it.

You ever considered it's You that's wrong?

[Valo]

Why do I have to believe that?

It's not even established that they landed in the Americas.

You're pretty new to Mormonism, aren't you?

The Angel Moroni told Joseph Smith that there was a record containing a history of the people of "this continent," i.e. the one Joseph Smith was in, i.e. the Americas. Nephi was shown in vision the seed of his brethren being scattered by the Gentiles. The Book of Mormon says that the Lamanites are among the ancestors of the American Indians.

As I said before, the last Jaredite lived among the people described in the Book of Mormon, and the search party sent out by the people of Limhi encountered the remains of the Jaredite civilization. Plus Mosiah translated the plates left behind by the last Jaredite prophet.

You ought to read the Book of Mormon sometime. It'll make it abundantly clear that the Jaredite barges were sea ships, not space ships. . . not to mention the fact that rocket technology wasn't available c. 2,000 years before Christ.

"Now, you may say, "I need some help in this process And therefore, I am going to find someone else to help me." It may be a therapist, it may be a clergyman, it may be a guru It may be any kind of person who teaches a technique of self-improvement.

Now, how will you know whether this person is able to teach you? How can you judge, for example, whether a psychotherapist is effective, or just a charlatan? How can you judge Whethеr a guru is himself spiritually wise, or merе ly a good chatterbox?

Well, of course, you ask your friends, you ask his other students, or patients And they're all, of course, enthusiastic You have to be enthusiastic when you bought something expensive If you bought an automobile, which turned out to be a lemon It's very difficult to admit that it was a lemon, and that you were fooled.

And it's the same when you buy a religion or an expensive operation But what people do not sufficiently realize is that when you pick an authority, whether it's a psychotherapeutic one, or a religious one.

[Chorus] You chose it You chose it You chose it You chose it

In other words That this fellow, or this book, or this system is the right one is your opinion And how are you competent to judge?

After all, if you're saying to this other person or other source "I think you are the authority," That's your opinion, so you cannot really judge whether an authority is a sound authority unless you yourself are a sound authority. Otherwise, you may just be being fooled.

You may say, for example, I believe that the Bible is the word of God All right, that's your opinion I know the Bible says it's the word of God, but it's your opinion that the Bible is not lying The Church says the Bible is the word of God, but it's your opinion that the church is right.

You cannot escape from that situation, it's your opinion!

[Chorus]You chose it You chose it You chose it You chose it"

https://youtu.be/GYfpFFCSOb8?si=oMlSqntoFPt622yl

and bonus tracks

https://youtu.be/HYIA4YNYHv4?si=vzHComVAImJD4R5S

https://youtu.be/2roat9l9NUY?si=mQsoiyOmfzE7Qbo7

"If you bought someone else's script, you bought it!"

[bill4long]

The Angel Moroni told Joseph Smith....

I keep trying to call this Moroni dude, but he won't take my call.

[bill4long]

"Now, you may say, "I need some help in this process And therefore, I am going to find someone else to help me." It may be a therapist, it may be a clergyman, it may be a guru It may be any kind of person who teaches a technique of self-improvement.

Well, cost/benefit and risk/reward is the most rational way to choose between alteratives if one is actually interested in the most statistically positive outcome. But in a rough-and-ready hillbilly sort of way, I sure wouldn't trust the claims of a "prophet" who did such a stupid job on the Book of Abraham and its facsimiles as Joe did. And that's just the beginning.

[Valo]

"Now, you may say, "I need some help in this process And therefore, I am going to find someone else to help me." It may be a therapist, it may be a clergyman, it may be a guru It may be any kind of person who teaches a technique of self-improvement.

Well, cost/benefit and risk/reward is the most rational way to choose between alteratives if one is actually interested in the most statistically positive outcome. But in a rough-and-ready hillbilly sort of way, I sure wouldn't trust the claims of a "prophet" who did such a stupid job on the Book of Abraham and its facsimiles as Joe did. And that's just the beginning.

So how can you tell someone is an authority?

If you are looking for a prophet to show the way, how do you know?

Well, I felt a burning in my bosom, you say. And thar is the fountain of knowledge? A burning in the bosom?

It's a feeling and it's your opinion that this feeling comes from God. You have no F ing idea, not really.

So how about a little humility for starters?

[Valo]

The Angel Moroni told Joseph Smith....

I keep trying to call this Moroni dude, but he won't take my call.

Angel Moroni seems to be a fabrication but we have to be careful. Things are mucked up. That means we have to carefully extract the Truth from the tangled messy ball of fishing line.

[bill4long]

So how can you tell someone is an authority?

I don't know, but causing the moons of Jupiter to start orbiting in the reverse direction on command might be a good start.

If you are looking for a prophet to show the way, how do you know?

I'm not looking for a prophet. If the creator wants me to know something, it can let me know directly.

Well, I felt a burning in my bosom, you say. And thar is the fountain of knowledge? A burning in the bosom?

There is no reason to think the burning bosom test is reliable.

It's a feeling and it's your opinion that this feeling comes from God. You have no F ing idea, not really.

I agree.

So how about a little humility for starters?

Humility is good.

[Valo]

So how can you tell someone is an authority?

I don't know, but causing the moons of Jupiter to start orbiting in the reverse direction on command might be a good start.

If you are looking for a prophet to show the way, how do you know?

I'm not looking for a prophet. If the creator wants me to know something, it can let me know directly.

Well, I felt a burning in my bosom, you say. And thar is the fountain of knowledge? A burning in the bosom?

There is no reason to think the burning bosom test is reliable.

It's a feeling and it's your opinion that this feeling comes from God. You have no F ing idea, not really.

I agree.

So how about a little humility for starters?

Humility is good.

I mean, what level of proof could be offered in the end that can't be questioned, right?

Let's look at it more broadly. When I say prophet, it can be anyone that you are going to in order to become a better person or anyone that you think has the answers for how you should live, what you should believe, etc.

You are right, the Creator can tell you directly. Are you listening? Or do you listen?

How many "tongues" are there? I don't think tongues is just spoken word, because words are just symbols that have a meaning attached to them or they describe something else.

Burning in the bosom is not a reliable test, but it is something. It's not just acid reflux. Does God speak to us via strong emotional responses in our body, ever? Why would He?

Is there a means for God to speak to us that cannot be manipulated or controlled by someone?

In Mormonism the communication line for God goes through the President of the Church. Everyone who wants to have respect in the Church or have any standing of any kind, must relinquish final control of what, how, when, and where God speaks to you. They have said, that man there, he will show us the way. I have this very strong emotional feelings when I consider this man. I prayed! I pondered! I read! And now I know this man is the man!

It's a big money scheme, ultimately. It's no different than all the ancient religions that were built up to take advantage of man by saying, "You feel guilty? Ashamed? Can't control your urges? You need help getting in to heaven? Well, come here! Sign up today for free membership and for money we will give you all the sacred rituals and rights, and secret sacred knowledge you need to get to heaven. Just 10 percent of gross income! For heaven, the highest glory, wow, that's a deal! Not to mention the super secret elite club, you know, a pattern within a pattern.

Whatever a prophet is or God, I think we agree it's not that.

[Dr. Shades]

You ought to read the Book of Mormon sometime. It'll make it abundantly clear that the Jaredite barges were sea ships, not space ships. . . not to mention the fact that rocket technology wasn't available c. 2,000 years before Christ.

No, that's not it.

Yes, that is it.

You ever considered it's You that's wrong?

Whether I'm wrong or not is irrelevant. Whether the Book of Mormon is wrong is the issue at, uh, issue. You seem to believe it is. In that case, just make up whatever you want, but don't claim it has anything to do with the Book of Mormon.