Why are ordinances required?

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_asbestosman
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Post by _asbestosman »

Sethbag wrote:Not only is the Flood = Earth's Baptism hokey on the grounds that a global, worldwide flood didn't happen, but wouldn't Noah's Ark bobbing along on top of the water count as a toe sticking up out of the water, so God would have to do it again, and this time get it right?


I'm still waiting for the earth to take out her endowments and get sealed to . . . uhhh, Kolob?
That's General Leo. He could be my friend if he weren't my enemy.
eritis sicut dii
I support NCMO
_Bond...James Bond
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Post by _Bond...James Bond »

moksha wrote:
Sethbag wrote:...when was the earth baptised?

July 27, 1907 2:40 pm at the Glendale Second Ward.


ROTFCMLUL! Jesus moksha. Will you put a "Warning: cough up a lung laughing probability" warning on your posts? Man that is funny.
"Whatever appears to be against the Book of Mormon is going to be overturned at some time in the future. So we can be pretty open minded."-charity 3/7/07
_Who Knows
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Post by _Who Knows »

Bond...James Bond wrote:...ROTFCMLUL!


? I've never seen that one before. Rolling on the floor cause my leg's under lettuce?
WK: "Joseph Smith asserted that the Book of Mormon peoples were the original inhabitants of the americas"
Will Schryver: "No, he didn’t." 3/19/08
Still waiting for Will to back this up...
_Jason Bourne
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Post by _Jason Bourne »

moksha wrote:
Sethbag wrote:...when was the earth baptised?

July 27, 1907 2:40 pm at the Glendale Second Ward.


Teeeeheeheheheeee
_Jason Bourne
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Post by _Jason Bourne »

Sethbag wrote:Not only is the Flood = Earth's Baptism hokey on the grounds that a global, worldwide flood didn't happen, but wouldn't Noah's Ark bobbing along on top of the water count as a toe sticking up out of the water, so God would have to do it again, and this time get it right?


This is kind of funny too. But I guess since the ark was not part of the earth it would not be considered it toe. Fingernail maybe?
_asbestosman
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Joined: Tue Nov 07, 2006 10:32 pm

Post by _asbestosman »

Jason Bourne wrote:
Sethbag wrote:Not only is the Flood = Earth's Baptism hokey on the grounds that a global, worldwide flood didn't happen, but wouldn't Noah's Ark bobbing along on top of the water count as a toe sticking up out of the water, so God would have to do it again, and this time get it right?


This is kind of funny too. But I guess since the ark was not part of the earth it would not be considered it toe. Fingernail maybe?


More like the dry clothes you change back into after the ordinance is done.

Now if Noah happened to have his anchor out and reaching between the bottom of the ocean and his ark, that would be a different matter.
That's General Leo. He could be my friend if he weren't my enemy.
eritis sicut dii
I support NCMO
_Bond...James Bond
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Joined: Tue Nov 07, 2006 4:49 am

Post by _Bond...James Bond »

Who Knows wrote:
Bond...James Bond wrote:...ROTFCMLUL!


? I've never seen that one before. Rolling on the floor cause my leg's under lettuce?


Sorry. I guess I shouldn't make up things. That's "rolling on the floor coughing my lungs up laughing". Too graphic?
"Whatever appears to be against the Book of Mormon is going to be overturned at some time in the future. So we can be pretty open minded."-charity 3/7/07
_Who Knows
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Post by _Who Knows »

Bond...James Bond wrote:"rolling on the floor coughing my lungs up laughing"


Ah, yes, that makes much more sense.

ROTFLSHISMCO.

There, try that.
WK: "Joseph Smith asserted that the Book of Mormon peoples were the original inhabitants of the americas"
Will Schryver: "No, he didn’t." 3/19/08
Still waiting for Will to back this up...
_Bond...James Bond
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Posts: 4627
Joined: Tue Nov 07, 2006 4:49 am

Post by _Bond...James Bond »

Who Knows wrote:
ROTFLSHISMCO.


Rolling on the floor loudly s***ing hellfire into some macaroni (&) cheese omelettes?

No clue.
"Whatever appears to be against the Book of Mormon is going to be overturned at some time in the future. So we can be pretty open minded."-charity 3/7/07
_Who Knows
_Emeritus
Posts: 2455
Joined: Wed Nov 01, 2006 6:09 pm

Post by _Who Knows »

Bond...James Bond wrote:
Who Knows wrote:
ROTFLSHISMCO.


Rolling on the floor loudly s***ing hellfire into some macaroni (&) cheese omelettes?

No clue.


Haha, yeah, that's it exactly!
WK: "Joseph Smith asserted that the Book of Mormon peoples were the original inhabitants of the americas"
Will Schryver: "No, he didn’t." 3/19/08
Still waiting for Will to back this up...
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