I will try not to offend!

[_Mr. Coffee]

Your brother, as always, in the harness.

In the what? I have never heard this expression before.

I think it's some sort of BDSM reference, Dude. Be afraid, be very afraid...

[_The Dude]

Your brother, as always, in the harness.

In the what? I have never heard this expression before.

Hello, my dear brother.

Maybe I can help you out with the idea of a "harness."

Apostates, like yourself, are considered to have "dropped out of the harness." While loyal followers of Christ are those considered to be "in the harness."

It's a beautiful image, is it not? All of us strapped in to the harness together, pulling the wagon (Church) to the promised land.

My Stake President, when I was a young student, was fond of this image and I think it is a perfect image to capture the beauty of the Gospel. I am surprised you haven't heard of it before.

I see. I thought it was something like that, but no, I've never heard it.

To me this imagery calls to mind the fact that harnessed beasts are often fitted with blinders, to keep them from seeing the wider world around them. When the master cracks his whip, the thinking has been done. Apostates, like myself, are considered to have "removed our blinders" while followers of religious faith are considered to be wearing blinders as a necessary component of their continued loyalty.

Enjoy the trappings of your faith!

[_Mr. Coffee]

To me this imagery calls to mind the fact that harnessed beasts are often fitted with blinders, to keep them from seeing the wider world around them. When the master cracks his whip, the thinking has been done. Apostates, like myself, are considered to have "removed our blinders" while followers of religious faith are considered to be wearing blinders as a necessary component of their continued loyalty.

Enjoy the trappings of your faith!

It's pretty sad when someone has to nrrow their world veiw in order to retain "faith". To me, that says that either A. Their religion is so fanciful that cursory examination of it could debunk it, or B. Their "faith" in that religion is very fragile.

[_marg]

To my dear sister, Marg. Stay away from our young ones. With your arguments about Joseph Smith being a nighttime sheep stealer, we wouldn't have any kids, to grow up into tithe-payers, would we? And then how would we continue to buy nice real estate and build beautiful temples?

You don't have to worry David, even if members stopped paying tithes, the church still has billions in assets, in particular investments and businesses bringing in revenues such that it could continue for quite some time, probably centuries without receiving another dime from members. And since you say the world is going to end in the next 400 years, perhaps it's an idea to stop requesting 10 % tithes and give the members a break in their present life. You guys, supposedly take in over 6 billion dollars a year. I don't think you could spend that even it you tried. No wonder you are into buying malls, businesses and real estate. But again what do you need it for, if the world is going to end soon. Unless of course you think you can take money to another world and they will accept the currency. I'm not sure how deluded your thinking is.

Restt assured though, your organization is financially secure,. If you play your cards right you'll have a good paying job for life. You do get paid by the church don't you? I think I read somewhere that businesses as a whole in the U.S. give more money as a percentage of their earnings to charity than the Mormon church does. So you guys must be socking it away, do you think you're going to surpass the Catholic church one day in financail wealth?

by the way, I'm very impressed , you really do read posts on this board and have an excellent grasp of what various posters are saying. So you think the reason the church is losing people is because they've been offended? I was thinking it might be because people are becoming better informed.

[_Jason Bourne]

If I put this delicately I would say that "your gift of discernment is not providing you with accurate information." But for effect, and hopefully to influence you, I will say it bluntly. "David, you head is squarely up your ass." I know the truth is hard to bear. I do not have to "come back" to the "fold" for I never left. I am the gospel doctrine teacher in my ward, and am a home teacher. My Bishop's gift of discernment is also gone on vacation,

NO WAY DV!!! You teach GD in your ward!!?? How do you do it?

[_desert_vulture]

If I put this delicately I would say that "your gift of discernment is not providing you with accurate information." But for effect, and hopefully to influence you, I will say it bluntly. "David, you head is squarely up your ass." I know the truth is hard to bear. I do not have to "come back" to the "fold" for I never left. I am the gospel doctrine teacher in my ward, and am a home teacher. My Bishop's gift of discernment is also gone on vacation,

NO WAY DV!!! You teach GD in your ward!!?? How do you do it?

Yeah, I have to admit it's pretty tough sometimes. I believe in the core Christian values, and focus on them primarily. Love, charity, compassion, forgiveness, and friendship. I try to apply the lessons from the Sermon on the Mount to everything. Amazingly, it works. I rarely teach from the manual, other than following the topic. I do it my way and nobody minds. Its pretty envigorating really, to give a lesson to a bunch of TBMs, start their wheels turning in ways they never have, and get thanked for it afterwards. It's never boring, there is 100% participation, and I never get through half of my material. I have to admit, I am a chameleon. Some would say I'm a hypocrite. I don't really give a damn what bloggernacle/RfM types think. I'm a NOM, pure and simple. Some Sundays I really have to psyche up before teaching, because the apostate part of me wants to give the entire lesson from JoD or Studies of the Book of Mormon. What motivates me is that I have a lot of very good friends in the ward, and I want to get them thinking. If I can get them thinking more, then I have accomplished my goal. If they can question things themselves, and come to a better understanding then I believe I have helped them in their lives. I focus on the good in the church, as I teach. I give them apostate milk before apostate meat. Most of them will never be prepared for the meat. None of the discussions are ever as in-depth as what we can do online, but face to face interaction is enjoyable for me as well. I hope that answers your question. I didn't want the calling but the Bishopric felt inspired to call me. Imagine that? I asked them point blank if it was an inspired calling, and I was told "Yes". (Imagine my surprize!) Lunatics in charge of the assylum I tell you..

[_harmony]

I didn't want the calling but the Bishopric felt inspired to call me. Imagine that? I asked them point blank if it was an inspired calling, and I was told "Yes". (Imagine my surprize!) Lunatics in charge of the assylum I tell you..

Or brilliant men, in tune with the spirit, who instinctively knew you had something to offer that no one did. Something that everyone needed. I see no contradiction in what you said. This is the Church of Jesus Christ, not the Church of the Mormon Prophets.

[_Roger Morrison]

WOW! Brother Bednar, WELCOME TO THIS BOARD! Will You, with your credentials AND Authority, represent we-here to the higher echelon of our Lord's Church??? You might recall, i PMd you. Now, i would like to get serious! Will You please help us? Warmest regards, Faithfully, Roger

[_David A. Bednar]

WOW! Brother Bednar, WELCOME TO THIS BOARD! Will You, with your credentials AND Authority, represent we-here to the higher echelon of our Lord's Church??? You might recall, I PMd you. Now, I would like to get serious! Will You please help us? Warmest regards, Faithfully, Roger

Hello, my dear brother. Yes, I remember your message.

How may I help you? (That's why I am here.)

[_David A. Bednar]

I didn't want the calling but the Bishopric felt inspired to call me. Imagine that? I asked them point blank if it was an inspired calling, and I was told "Yes". (Imagine my surprize!) Lunatics in charge of the assylum I tell you..

Or brilliant men, in tune with the spirit, who instinctively knew you had something to offer that no one did. Something that everyone needed. I see no contradiction in what you said. This is the Church of Jesus Christ, not the Church of the Mormon Prophets.

Yes, dear sister, Harmony (I love that name, by the way).

The Lord does, indeed, work in mysterious ways (for example, the true moral relativity principle). But, you are stretching the concept just a bit too far by applying it to deseret_vulture's situation.

As I mentioned in a previous missive, we are looking into deseret_vulture's identity. In fact, we think we have figured it out, after much pondering and prayer. Mark my words, he won't be the Gospel Doctrine teacher for much longer.

God will not be mocked. You can take that right to the Kirtland bank and cash it in!

Your brother in the harness (and, yes, with blinders, to perfect the image.)

Elder David A. Bednar