Believing members: If it weren't true, would u want to know?

[_ajax18]

Actually even in the animal kingdom, in the harem lifestyle, the females while attached to a male are not faithful to him. They "sleep around." ;-)

Yeah, that's a very good point, and admittedly difficult to deal with.

Research is very conclusive about this... the vast majority of humans pair bond. They just do.

So how do you explain those that don't?

To be honest, I wonder if you had a really fabulous marriage if you would not be less inclined to having multiple women to adore and cater to you. Just a thought.... ;-)

Probably so. A lot of these attitudes are set during the dating game, an ugly time when we learn that all is fair in love and war. Nothing was fair from the beginning. I say that dating is so unfair to men from the beginning that they stop expecting fairness in relationships and just try to make the best of it from the get go.

Like I said before, I realize that we live in a fallen world and that women as far back as our animal ancestors weren't in an equal relationship with the males they were with. Nobody was equal for that matter. Most males weren't in relationships at all for most of their lives. It's a feast or famine game for men, and in my view it still is. You'd be amazed how much more women go after men who are older and more established. I'm not talking 30 year old women after 35-40 year old men. I'm talking 20-25 year old women after 35-40 year olds. It's just how we're wired I guess and what we want doesn't always fit with another persons idea of what's fair, nor what we should want.

You're making conclusions as well. You're saying that I want women serving and adoring me. I don't really know what the next world is going to be like. That was the whole point of my argument and why I left that open. I still say it's possible for all these things to work out in the best interest of everyone. I understand what implications you see based on our earthly experience and I agree that it wouldn't be fair to women given what we know now. I'm just leaving the next world open to new discoveriers, new ways of thinking, in which everyone can be satisfied.

[_barrelomonkeys]

I'm talking 20-25 year old women after 35-40 year olds. It's just how we're wired I guess and what we want doesn't always fit with another persons idea of what's fair, nor what we should want.

What's wrong with a 20 something year old woman wanting an older, established man?

[_ajax18]

I'm talking 20-25 year old women after 35-40 year olds. It's just how we're wired I guess and what we want doesn't always fit with another persons idea of what's fair, nor what we should want.

What's wrong with a 20 something year old woman wanting an older, established man?

In my view nothing. But it seems to lend more support to my animal model of human mating behavior than to a pair bonding type of desire. A lot of women want the established man so badly they'll be willing to be his mistress and forego the less established man. Intimacy that comes only through monogamy seems to take a back seat to a higher priority. Money! These women aren't forced to be mistresses. They share this man because they would rather share than not have him at all.

[_barrelomonkeys]

I'm talking 20-25 year old women after 35-40 year olds. It's just how we're wired I guess and what we want doesn't always fit with another persons idea of what's fair, nor what we should want.

What's wrong with a 20 something year old woman wanting an older, established man?

In my view nothing. But it seems to lend more support to my animal model of human mating behavior than to a pair bonding type of desire. A lot of women want the established man so badly they'll be willing to be his mistress and forego the less established man. Intimacy that comes only through monogamy seems to take a back seat to a higher priority. Money! These women aren't forced to be mistresses. They share this man because they would rather share than not have him at all.

Oh. I understand your point. Well I'm married to a man 10+ years older than I am. I was concerned about the age difference at first but now am so thankful he convinced me to give him a chance.

[_harmony]

And yet society judges the older woman mating with the younger man as unacceptable.

[_asbestosman]

And yet society judges the older woman mating with the younger man as unacceptable.

Odd. I was unaware of that particular stigma.

I actually think it might not be such a bad idea seeing as how then they might be more likely to buy the farm at the same time and thus spare the other one of an extended widow(er)hood.

[_truth dancer]

Hi Ajax...

You brought up some very good points.

First, it sounds like you do understand that in polygamy, unless you are powerful, rich, or high up in the church heirarchy, you don't get a wife at all.

The alpha males are getting all the young attractive girls and women.

If you aren't rich and powerful, you are out of luck.

Interesting to note, polygamy was outlawed by the Romans, NOT because they cared for women but because the less powerful men wanted to have the chance for a wife, and because they realized society does not do well when half the men do not have a partner.

You're making conclusions as well. You're saying that I want women serving and adoring me.

Actually I was trying to be lighthearted ... rather than saying you want a bunch of women for sex, (smile). I do think many men who think polygamy is ideal have visions of being worshipped and adored by a bunch of beautiful women... having all their needs met, being catered to and doted upon. But I apologize if you have something different in mind. :-) Guys who do not really care about the happiness of women, but only want their ego boosted and their sexual needs fulfilled, tend to have a bit of a distorted perspective, in my opinion. (I'm not saying YOU fall into this catagory... I'm speaking generally here).

In the harem lifestyle, there is no partnership, emotional intimacy, or unity and oneness between partners. It is a society of women and children with a male visitor/sperm donor.

Sounds like we agree that there is more to the story than many have suggested!

:-)

~dancer~

[_barrelomonkeys]

And yet society judges the older woman mating with the younger man as unacceptable.

I think that is definitely changing Harmony. There seems to be a lot of "You go girl!" associated with older women and younger men.

Personally I don't like younger men, but have no issues with age differences. What ever floats your boat.

[_Yoda]

I'm just leaving the next world open to new discoveriers, new ways of thinking, in which everyone can be satisfied.

Would you be this open to "new ways of thinking" if polyandry had been preached in the scriptures as the norm?

[_asbestosman]

I'm just leaving the next world open to new discoveriers, new ways of thinking, in which everyone can be satisfied.

Would you be this open to "new ways of thinking" if polyandry had been preached in the scriptures as the norm?

I think it has its advantages too. Then I wouldn't have had to work as hard to get in with the woman of my choice--if she already had a man I could always volunteer to be the next.

As it is I lucked out with the added benefit that I don't have to share. Still, the polyandry option doesn't seem so bad if things hadn't worked out in my favor.