A truly classic MA&D thread, with a zinger from cinepro

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_Tarski
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Post by _Tarski »

Sorry guys but if a beautiful woman walks by me wearing something insanely sexy I count my lucky stars.
But somehow, I don't lose control of myself. I am amazing aren't I?
when believers want to give their claims more weight, they dress these claims up in scientific terms. When believers want to belittle atheism or secular humanism, they call it a "religion". -Beastie

yesterday's Mormon doctrine is today's Mormon folklore.-Buffalo
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_SatanWasSetUp
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Post by _SatanWasSetUp »

Tarski wrote:Sorry guys but if a beautiful women walks by me wearing something insanely sexy I count my lucky stars.
But somehow, I don't lose control of myself. I am amazing aren't I?


You are amazing. According to Boyd K Packer, our little factories are self regulating and will release the excess substance at an appropriate time. God saw fit to ensure that the substance does not release in our pants when the lovely ladies walk by, but instead at night when our brains produce XXX rated dreams about them.
"We of this Church do not rely on any man-made statement concerning the nature of Deity. Our knowledge comes directly from the personal experience of Joseph Smith." - Gordon B. Hinckley

"It's wrong to criticize leaders of the Mormon Church even if the criticism is true." - Dallin H. Oaks
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_Runtu
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Post by _Runtu »

SatanWasSetUp wrote:
Tarski wrote:Sorry guys but if a beautiful women walks by me wearing something insanely sexy I count my lucky stars.
But somehow, I don't lose control of myself. I am amazing aren't I?


You are amazing. According to Boyd K Packer, our little factories are self regulating and will release the excess substance at an appropriate time. God saw fit to ensure that the substance does not release in our pants when the lovely ladies walk by, but instead at night when our brains produce XXX rated dreams about them.


In those cases, I just dream I'm singing a hymn. ;-)

I had a mission companion who would sing hymns at the top of his lungs every morning as we waited for the bus. I always wondered what he was thinking about.

For the record, cinepro is one of my all-time favorite posters on MAD.
Runtu's Rincón

If you just talk, I find that your mouth comes out with stuff. -- Karl Pilkington
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_beastie
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Post by _beastie »

For the record, cinepro is one of my all-time favorite posters on MAD.


Oh, me too, hands down. He was great on Z, too.

(no pun intended, given the thread's topic)
We hate to seem like we don’t trust every nut with a story, but there’s evidence we can point to, and dance while shouting taunting phrases.

Penn & Teller

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_Always Thinking
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Post by _Always Thinking »

dh served a mission in Micronesia. On one of the islands (Yap), it was quite normal for women to go topless. There were topless women all over, young and old, saggy and perky. It was strange at first, (sometimes a turn on, many times NOT, lol). After a while, he got used to it.

I think there needs to be more topless women walking around!
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_Always Thinking
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Post by _Always Thinking »

Runtu wrote:For the record, cinepro is one of my all-time favorite posters on MAD.


ditto that!
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_Bond...James Bond
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Post by _Bond...James Bond »

Always Thinking wrote:I think there needs to be more topless women walking around!


This is probably the best opinion of ever written. Never have I agreed so much with something as I do with this.
"Whatever appears to be against the Book of Mormon is going to be overturned at some time in the future. So we can be pretty open minded."-charity 3/7/07
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_The Nehor
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Post by _The Nehor »

Runtu wrote:I had a mission companion who would sing hymns at the top of his lungs every morning as we waited for the bus. I always wondered what he was thinking about.


You? ;)
"Surely he knows that DCP, The Nehor, Lamanite, and other key apologists..." -Scratch clarifying my status in apologetics
"I admit it; I'm a petty, petty man." -Some Schmo
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_Nephi

Re: A truly classic MA&D thread, with a zinger from cine

Post by _Nephi »

Dr. Shades wrote:
Nephi wrote:What, just because I have that urge, does that mean I should pee right then and their?


Nephi, please read this post.

I apologize. It was 4am when I posted that. I type some 60-75 wpm depending, and I didn't see that when I posted it.
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_Nephi

Post by _Nephi »

Scottie wrote:I seriously doubt that the sexual urge would have been that much less even if she were in a modest bathing suit.

Hell, I say we go back to the time when a woman showing her ankle was considered porn!! The middle east has the right idea. Lets get the burka's out and cover them temptresses up!!

During the early puritan days of the New World, women were one step away from a burkah, wearing cloth from neck to feet, and a bonnet, and yet if a woman so much as showed an ankle, OMG, what a sin, cause it provoked the thoughts of men. Face it, men are wired to find women beautiful, and it doesn't matter how they are dressed. Its okay. God made it this way, but he also gave us free agency and the ability to not comply with our urges. Any man who thinks a woman should control themselves because the man cannot control himself is just bad logic, plain and simple.
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