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One thing that has always bothered me, as a member of the Church, is the judgmental attitudes of other members. These judgmental attitudes seem to exist toward other members who may not be living the Church standards to "their" specifications. It could also apply to non-members or former members of the Church.

The gospel does not encourage this type of behavior, yet it seems to be very prevalent in Church members.

I can understand wanting to protect your family members (children in particular) from harm due to association with a "bad" crowd, which, in my opinion, would be along the lines of kids who are doing drugs, etc.

But this constant "putting your nose in someone else's business" and feeling that you have the right to judge others when none of us are perfect is not a way, in my opinion, to conduct your life, or interact with others.

Thoughts?

liz3564 wrote:One thing that has always bothered me, as a member of the Church, is the judgemental attitudes of other members. These judgemental attitudes seem to exist toward other members who may not be living the Church standards to "their" specifications. It could also apply to non-members or former members of the Church.

The gospel does not encourage this type of behavior, yet it seems to be very prevalent in Church members.

I can understand wanting to protect your family members (children in particular) from harm due to association with a "bad" crowd, which, in my opinion, would be along the lines of kids who are doing drugs, etc.

But this constant "putting your nose in someone else's business" and feeling that you have the right to judge others when none of us are perfect is not a way, in my opinion, to conduct your life, or interact with others.

Thoughts?

It's human nature to be judgmental to a point, but tight knit groups, like Mormons, tend to be more judgmental. Also, Mormonism emphasises things that encourages judgmental attitudes. The emphasis on appearance makes it easy to judge others by the number of earrings they wear, the color of their shirt, facial hair, hair length, flip-flops, etc. These are all things that make someone less worthy, and they are easy to spot. Most members at some point in their lives are put in leadership positions which require them to judge the worthiness of others. The emaphasis on attending meetings and magnifying your calling makes it easy to spot the slackers. Temple attendance is a quick and easy way to spot who is temple worthy. If Bob hasn't been on a ward temple trip for two years, many will assume Bob must be committing sins that prevent him from getting a recommend. If Jenny hasn't been to church for a month, her Visiting Teachers will be sent out by the bishropric to find out what is going on with her, and "return and report."

So although judging others is a human weakness, Mormonism is structured in such a way to encourage this behavior from its members.

liz3564 wrote:One thing that has always bothered me, as a member of the Church, is the judgemental attitudes of other members. These judgemental attitudes seem to exist toward other members who may not be living the Church standards to "their" specifications. It could also apply to non-members or former members of the Church.

The gospel does not encourage this type of behavior, yet it seems to be very prevalent in Church members.

I can understand wanting to protect your family members (children in particular) from harm due to association with a "bad" crowd, which, in my opinion, would be along the lines of kids who are doing drugs, etc.

But this constant "putting your nose in someone else's business" and feeling that you have the right to judge others when none of us are perfect is not a way, in my opinion, to conduct your life, or interact with others.

Thoughts?

The Church makes strong claims. We are modern Israel, the Only True and Living Church, hold the true priesthood, are not just a religious people but a covenant people. This mind set can certainly cause what you describe and I believe Church members must take extra care to not let these beliefs make them arrogant and judgmental. Some do better with it then others. But culturally speaking, I see LDS at times putting their noses, especially towards other ward members, where it does not belong.

Jason wrote:The Church makes strong claims. We are modern Israel, the Only True and Living Church, hold the true priesthood, are not just a religious people but a covenant people. This mind set can certainly cause what you describe and I believe Church members must take extra care to not let these beliefs make them arrogant and judgmental. Some do better with it then others. But culturally speaking, I see LDS at times putting their noses, especially towards other ward members, where it does not belong.

Thanks for weighing in on this, Jason.

Let me go a step further. What do you think that we, as Church members, can do to combat this attitude?

liz3564 wrote:

Jason wrote:The Church makes strong claims. We are modern Israel, the Only True and Living Church, hold the true priesthood, are not just a religious people but a covenant people. This mind set can certainly cause what you describe and I believe Church members must take extra care to not let these beliefs make them arrogant and judgmental. Some do better with it then others. But culturally speaking, I see LDS at times putting their noses, especially towards other ward members, where it does not belong.

Thanks for weighing in on this, Jason.

Let me go a step further. What do you think that we, as Church members, can do to combat this attitude?

I don't think it's a member issue. It has to come from leadership. The culture of Mormonism has to change, and that comes from Salt Lake. There is an old saying in business: The fish rots from the head. The members are doing the best they can but Mormonism is a judmental religion. Until that changes, members will have a difficult time not judging others.

I don't think it's a member issue. It has to come from leadership. The culture of Mormonism has to change, and that comes from Salt Lake. There is an old saying in business: The fish rots from the head. The members are doing the best they can but Mormonism is a judmental religion. Until that changes, members will have a difficult time not judging others.

But we can still take responsibility for our own actions. Maybe if we can take baby steps in at least attempting to be less judgmental toward each other, it will catch on.

Why is it so difficult to give people the benefit of the doubt? You mentioned "Bill", who hadn't attended the temple in two years. Maybe "Bill" hadn't attended the temple because he was working, and the travel distance was a hardship. Maybe he had to take care of an ill family member. Why must we always think the worst of people? I guess because it's so much juicier than thinking the best of people. *sigh*

liz3564 wrote:But we can still take responsibility for our own actions. Maybe if we can take baby steps in at least attempting to be less judgmental toward each other, it will catch on.

Why is it so difficult to give people the benefit of the doubt? You mentioned "Bill", who hadn't attended the temple in two years. Maybe "Bill" hadn't attended the temple because he was working, and the travel distance was a hardship. Maybe he had to take care of an ill family member. Why must we always think the worst of people? I guess because it's so much juicier than thinking the best of people. *sigh*

I believe the attitude is a result of increased focus on behavior as a sign of commitment to the church. Yes, we were told the Lord judges the heart, but our lessons were always about do's and don'ts (think of For the Strength of Youth, for example). When outward behavior is such a huge focus, of course people will begin to judge others by their adherence to these "standards" as indicative of "values" or lack thereof.

For what it's worth, I'm not sure Mormons are any more judgmental than other religious conservatives I've met, though the focus is slightly different.

Runtu wrote:

liz3564 wrote:But we can still take responsibility for our own actions. Maybe if we can take baby steps in at least attempting to be less judgmental toward each other, it will catch on.

Why is it so difficult to give people the benefit of the doubt? You mentioned "Bill", who hadn't attended the temple in two years. Maybe "Bill" hadn't attended the temple because he was working, and the travel distance was a hardship. Maybe he had to take care of an ill family member. Why must we always think the worst of people? I guess because it's so much juicier than thinking the best of people. *sigh*

I believe the attitude is a result of increased focus on behavior as a sign of commitment to the church. Yes, we were told the Lord judges the heart, but our lessons were always about do's and don'ts (think of For the Strength of Youth, for example). When outward behavior is such a huge focus, of course people will begin to judge others by their adherence to these "standards" as indicative of "values" or lack thereof.

For what it's worth, I'm not sure Mormons are any more judgmental than other religious conservatives I've met, though the focus is slightly different.

I think we need to spend more time concentrating on the "do's and don't's" being a means to an end. We need to be looking at the bigger picture which is following Christ.

liz3564 wrote:I think we need to spend more time concentrating on the "do's and don't's" being a means to an end. We need to be looking at the bigger picture which is following Christ.

I hate to sound cynical, but do you see this happening at all in the church? In my experience, the "dos and don'ts" are equated with following Christ; people see no difference.

Thanks for weighing in on this, Jason.

Let me go a step further. What do you think that we, as Church members, can do to combat this attitude?

Cultivate the Divine Attributes of Jesus Christ-Meekness, Mercy, Forgiveness and Charity or Love.