Free entertainment from the mindless at Mormon.com chat

Post by **_Polygamy Porter** » Tue May 08, 2007 11:28 pm

on the beta.Mormon.org site you can chat live with one of the mindless Mormon masses.

I have done so on a few occasions. Good times.

Recently I came on as an investigator who was about to commit to a dunking, but.....

I explain I just watched the PBS special on the Mormons and begin down a laundry list of juicy historical tidbits that mopologists quoted on the PBS show and explain how I am confused now, because the missionaries did not tell me this and that and the other...

I set a trap, and they walk right into it!

"The Prophet Joseph did not translate the plates using a stone in a hat!", they exclaim. The jaws of the trap are triggered and sssaaaNAP! I send em links to the site, and the Ensign article, and explain how DOCtor Danny C. P. is a board certified apologist for LDS.. and why would he not believe this reputable source from BYU?

After the silence, I set the next trap... the throat slashing in the temple.... and explain how the masons did this and did the Mormons copy masonry???? ssssNAP!!! goes the trap as I send over the link to the FARMs manure pile where the mopologists explain how the temple ceremony is PURIFIED MASONRY!!!

The poor saps... before I am done we are talking about the papyrus.. ahhh gooood times!

Try it out, it is much more fun than laying turds in the litterbox at the MAAD board!

Post by **_Polygamy Porter** » Tue May 08, 2007 11:50 pm

a visual aid to use when chatting with the mindless at beta.Mormon.org:

Post by **_Seven** » Wed May 09, 2007 12:20 am

You are so naughty! I can laugh about it because I used to be one of those "Chapel Mos" who would have fallen into the trap.

Post by **_The Nehor** » Wed May 09, 2007 4:49 am

This is what you do with your spare time.......sad, sad, sad.

Post by **_Polygamy Porter** » Wed May 09, 2007 6:09 am

The Nehor wrote:This is what you do with your spare time.......sad, sad, sad.

Its like going on splits, or doing home teaching 'cept in reverse!

Hey, I am doing your cult a favor by pointing out the pointless. If this is the face people see when they come for answers to Mormonism, whoa Nelly!

Post by **_The Nehor** » Wed May 09, 2007 6:27 am

Polygamy Porter wrote:
The Nehor wrote:This is what you do with your spare time.......sad, sad, sad.
Its like going on splits, or doing home teaching 'cept in reverse!

Hey, I am doing your cult a favor by pointing out the pointless. If this is the face people see when they come for answers to Mormonism, whoa Nelly!

Our cult also needs additional goats to slaughter on our Black Sabbaths but I don't see you offering any of those now, do I?

Post by **_Polygamy Porter** » Wed May 09, 2007 6:43 am

The Nehor wrote:Our cult also needs additional goats to slaughter on our Black Sabbaths but I don't see you offering any of those now, do I?

I always wondered about that...

Old humpin Joe claimed that he HAD to restore the polyg as it was part of the old testament church.. but why did he not bring back good ol' burnt offerings?

Post by **_The Nehor** » Wed May 09, 2007 6:46 am

Polygamy Porter wrote:I always wondered about that...

Old humpin Joe claimed that he HAD to restore the polyg as it was part of the old testament church.. but why did he not bring back good ol' burnt offerings?

You show your ignorance.....Joseph taught many times that animal sacrifice was coming back.

And you call yourself an ex-mormon (shakes head in despair)

Post by **_Polygamy Porter** » Wed May 09, 2007 6:59 am

The Nehor wrote:You show your ignorance.....Joseph taught many times that animal sacrifice was coming back.

And you call yourself an ex-mormon (shakes head in despair)

Actually, my bishie offered that as an excuse for Joe's sack hoppin, that ALL things from the old church had to be restored.

I said, but Joseph Smith only referred to polyg from the Old Testament.

"yeah so...", the bishie stumbled

"So why did he not bring back the back yard Old Testament barbecue?"

He was silent for a good minutes, eyes shifting around...

Then I decided to try the old Jacob verse about no polyg to see if he had an ounce of mopologist in him.

NOPE.

"Well, I, I, I, I dunno, ya seee... we, we, we, we don't know all that god asked him to do, now do we??"

He then wrapped it up and left. This was over two years ago, and we have not seen him pop in our home since!

Post by **_The Nehor** » Wed May 09, 2007 7:35 am

The Jacob verse is self-defeating. The sermon admits that God can command exceptions. How did your Bishop miss that, it's in most of the manuals I've used......weird.