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Just curious. If so, what was your mindset about being a mother of a missionary out serving? What did you get out of it?

msnobody wrote:Just curious. If so, what was your mindset about being a mother of a missionary out serving? What did you get out of it?

From what I observed with my parents and others in the wards, bragging rights in Relief Society.

msnobody wrote:Just curious. If so, what was your mindset about being a mother of a missionary out serving? What did you get out of it?

I was TBM when the first of my four missionary sons went out on his missions. What did I get out of it? The most incredible sadness I'd ever experienced. Nothing prepared me for the mind-numbing pain of being cut off from my son. The only way to live through it was to distance myself from it. Every letter was both anxiously awaited and dreaded because I knew he'd written it two weeks prior so long ago, he could have died in the meantime. I'd drive past an airport with a plane taking off and dissolve into tears.

It was the single most horrible two years of my life. Even when he had cancer and I thought he would die, I wasn't as upset as when he went on his mission. It got easier with the other three, but not much. Two chose to not go, and that was a good thing, for me. I don't do missions well.

harmony wrote:

msnobody wrote:Just curious. If so, what was your mindset about being a mother of a missionary out serving? What did you get out of it?

I was TBM when the first of my four missionary sons went out on his missions. What did I get out of it? The most incredible sadness I'd ever experienced. Nothing prepared me for the mind-numbing pain of being cut off from my son. The only way to live through it was to distance myself from it. Every letter was both anxiously awaited and dreaded because I knew he'd written it two weeks prior so long ago, he could have died in the meantime. I'd drive past an airport with a plane taking off and dissolve into tears.

It was the single most horrible two years of my life. Even when he had cancer and I thought he would die, I wasn't as upset as when he went on his mission. It got easier with the other three, but not much. Two chose to not go, and that was a good thing, for me. I don't do missions well.

Try sending your son off to war. Even though his tour was seven months I recall driving to his base, taking him out to dinner the night before he left and then his mother and I both crying hysterically as we hugged him after dinner that night wondering if we would see him ever again. Well he is back now since April and we get to do this again in September.

Jason Bourne wrote:

harmony wrote:

msnobody wrote:Just curious. If so, what was your mindset about being a mother of a missionary out serving? What did you get out of it?

I was TBM when the first of my four missionary sons went out on his missions. What did I get out of it? The most incredible sadness I'd ever experienced. Nothing prepared me for the mind-numbing pain of being cut off from my son. The only way to live through it was to distance myself from it. Every letter was both anxiously awaited and dreaded because I knew he'd written it two weeks prior so long ago, he could have died in the meantime. I'd drive past an airport with a plane taking off and dissolve into tears.

It was the single most horrible two years of my life. Even when he had cancer and I thought he would die, I wasn't as upset as when he went on his mission. It got easier with the other three, but not much. Two chose to not go, and that was a good thing, for me. I don't do missions well.

Try sending your son off to war. Even though his tour was seven months I recall driving to his base, taking him out to dinner the night before he left and then his mother and I both crying hysterically as we hugged him after dinner that night wondering if we would see him ever again. Well he is back now since April and we get to do this again in September.

Why does everything have to be a contest? War Trump's missions. Okay, that's settled.

Or is it?

My sister, whose daughter is now serving in that god-forsaken island nation of Salt Lake City, writes:

Good to have a missionary who can set one straight now and then. They make more gains in one month than most of us do in years because they have to just to survive. That is, if they are working at it."

Emphasis hers.

I really feel sorry for these Mormons who have to make a big deal out of missions to make it seem worthwhile.

Why does everything have to be a contest? War Trump's missions. Okay, that's settled.

I don't think Jason was trying to make it a "contest". I read it as more of relating to what Harmony went through by gleaning from his own personal experience, and hoping for some commiseration in the process.

Lucretia MacEvil wrote:

Jason Bourne wrote:

harmony wrote:

msnobody wrote:Just curious. If so, what was your mindset about being a mother of a missionary out serving? What did you get out of it?

I was TBM when the first of my four missionary sons went out on his missions. What did I get out of it? The most incredible sadness I'd ever experienced. Nothing prepared me for the mind-numbing pain of being cut off from my son. The only way to live through it was to distance myself from it. Every letter was both anxiously awaited and dreaded because I knew he'd written it two weeks prior so long ago, he could have died in the meantime. I'd drive past an airport with a plane taking off and dissolve into tears.

It was the single most horrible two years of my life. Even when he had cancer and I thought he would die, I wasn't as upset as when he went on his mission. It got easier with the other three, but not much. Two chose to not go, and that was a good thing, for me. I don't do missions well.

Try sending your son off to war. Even though his tour was seven months I recall driving to his base, taking him out to dinner the night before he left and then his mother and I both crying hysterically as we hugged him after dinner that night wondering if we would see him ever again. Well he is back now since April and we get to do this again in September.

Why does everything have to be a contest? War Trump's missions. Okay, that's settled.

Or is it?

My sister, whose daughter is now serving in that god-forsaken island nation of Salt Lake City, writes:

Good to have a missionary who can set one straight now and then. They make more gains in one month than most of us do in years because they have to just to survive. That is, if they are working at it."

Emphasis hers.

I really feel sorry for these Mormons who have to make a big deal out of missions to make it seem worthwhile.

I was just sharing some of my feelings and not trying to get into a contest. Sorry you read it that way.

When your son/daughter was out on mission, what were your conversations like with other TBMs in your ward?

Jason Bourne wrote:Try sending your son off to war. Even though his tour was seven months I recall driving to his base, taking him out to dinner the night before he left and then his mother and I both crying hysterically as we hugged him after dinner that night wondering if we would see him ever again. Well he is back now since April and we get to do this again in September.

War is worse in some ways, not so in others. I have a son in the Guard. I thought basic would be like a mission, but he could call home on the weekends. I'm not sure if military can call home occasionally from Irag or Afghanistan, but it seems like they can if they have access. And they can come home on leave. But at least on a mission they don't have poeple shooting at them (at least, not normally).

msnobody wrote:When your son/daughter was out on mission, what were your conversations like with other TBMs in your ward?

They'd ask how he was; I'd say he's fine. Nothing much. No one wanted to know how hard it was for any of them. They only wanted to know the good things, not the depressing mindnumbing things.