MDB Haiku

The catch-all forum for general topics and debates. Minimal moderation. Rated PG to PG-13.
_hans castorp
_Emeritus
Posts: 130
Joined: Sun Dec 18, 2011 7:26 am

Re: MDB Haiku

Post by _hans castorp »

In the mandala,
deities embrace,
a bargain at ten percent.
Blog: The Use of Talking

"Found him to be the village explainer. Very useful if you happen to be a village; if not, not." --Gertrude Stein
_Fence Sitter
_Emeritus
Posts: 8862
Joined: Sat Oct 02, 2010 3:49 pm

Re: MDB Haiku

Post by _Fence Sitter »

Proof by assertion
All publications doctrine
Claim win, run away
"Any over-ritualized religion since the dawn of time can make its priests say yes, we know, it is rotten, and hard luck, but just do as we say, keep at the ritual, stick it out, give us your money and you'll end up with the angels in heaven for evermore."
_Darth J
_Emeritus
Posts: 13392
Joined: Thu May 13, 2010 12:16 am

Re: MDB Haiku

Post by _Darth J »

From a previous thread:

Ancient submarines
Full of angry bees and cows
Oh, those Jaredites!

God wants us to share
I am the Prophet, you know
Can you spare your wife?

Mind your own business
Just like Reynolds v. U.S.
And vote for Prop 8

We're not a cult
With a charismatic leader
Seen that type lately?

Yes, the Church is true
It is the facts that are wrong
Help, persecution!

Time to go to Church
Faith-promoting homilies
Yikes,what a snoozefest

Boys have "factories"
Don't you go touching yourself
Normal is evil

I love the temple
Heaven is God's secret club
You know the handshake?

Mormon cinema
"Baptists at Our Barbecue"
Please, God, let me die
_Darth J
_Emeritus
Posts: 13392
Joined: Thu May 13, 2010 12:16 am

Re: MDB Haiku

Post by _Darth J »

Facts don't fit my faith
Better put it on the shelf
A big shelf, indeed

.......

Don't call them "Mormons"
No one is Mormon but us
Call us Christians, too
......
Lying is so bad
Lying to sell books is worse
You agree, Paul Dunn?
.....
Roadblocks to my faith
Removed by apologists
Nephites raised tapirs
....
Inspired by God
Oh, divine Consitution
My morals are law
....
We need a loophole
We wish they had not said that
That is not doctrine!
....
President Monson
What message does God have now?
Huh? Octopus traps?
_Chap
_Emeritus
Posts: 14190
Joined: Mon Jun 11, 2007 10:23 am

Re: MDB Haiku

Post by _Chap »

Don't know Egyptian.
But they've paid for these scrolls, so
I'll make something up.

Hey Joe, this is Abe.
Did you say I wrote that stuff?
You sure have a nerve!
Last edited by Guest on Tue Oct 16, 2012 11:45 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Zadok:
I did not have a faith crisis. I discovered that the Church was having a truth crisis.
Maksutov:
That's the problem with this supernatural stuff, it doesn't really solve anything. It's a placeholder for ignorance.
_Darth J
_Emeritus
Posts: 13392
Joined: Thu May 13, 2010 12:16 am

Re: MDB Haiku

Post by _Darth J »

Brigham Young, Prophet
Had lots and lots of money
Where did he get it?

Now Heber J, Grant
Says Word of Wisdom is law
Damn, what a buzzkill
_Blixa
_Emeritus
Posts: 8381
Joined: Fri Mar 23, 2007 12:45 pm

Re: MDB Haiku

Post by _Blixa »

Kishkumen wrote:
LDSToronto wrote:Metcalfe is butthead?
Updated for exactness:
Hamblin is douchebag


OK, now that is award winning stuff right there.


Oh there should be a prize...
From the Ernest L. Wilkinson Diaries: "ELW dreams he's spattered w/ grease. Hundreds steal his greasy pants."
_Blixa
_Emeritus
Posts: 8381
Joined: Fri Mar 23, 2007 12:45 pm

Re: MDB Haiku

Post by _Blixa »

I would not be able to judge among such riches....
From the Ernest L. Wilkinson Diaries: "ELW dreams he's spattered w/ grease. Hundreds steal his greasy pants."
_Kishkumen
_Emeritus
Posts: 21373
Joined: Sat Dec 13, 2008 10:00 pm

Re: MDB Haiku

Post by _Kishkumen »

droopy factory
he needs hate to compensate
hide the hurt with words
"Petition wasn’t meant to start a witch hunt as I’ve said 6000 times." ~ Hanna Seariac, LDS apologist
_Equality
_Emeritus
Posts: 3362
Joined: Thu Aug 28, 2008 3:44 pm

Re: MDB Haiku

Post by _Equality »

Droopy wants to know
Is Buffalo Bob Loblaw?
The answer is no.
"The Church is authoritarian, tribal, provincial, and founded on a loosely biblical racist frontier sex cult."--Juggler Vain
"The lds church is the Amway of religions. Even with all the soap they sell, they still manage to come away smelling dirty."--Some Schmo
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