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"Is there a priesthood holder on board?"
Posted: Sat Feb 17, 2024 11:44 pm
by drumdude
Mormonism's preeminent apologist is on a relaxing cruise that was recently struck by tragedy:
DCP wrote:We’ve been sailing steadily southward since our departure from Wellington, down toward the southern tip of New Zealand’s South Island. Except for a little while. Apparently, one of the passengers aboard the Oracle of the Seas suffered a medical emergency, so we headed back northward again, toward Dunedin, where a pilot boat was to meet us and to take the passenger ashore. For some reason, it was decided that taking him or her away in a rescue helicopter, for which our ship is fully equipped, would be less appropriate or feasible. I didn’t see the transfer, but friends from our group did, and they say that it looked as if a body bag was taken aboard the pilot boat. And that, I’m afraid, doesn’t sound very good. (And, I’m afraid, it might account for sending a relatively slow pilot boat out to meet us rather than a helicopter.) We watched the pilot head off toward Dunedin, which was still quite some distance away. It has been an exceptionally beautiful evening, with a nice sunset followed by moonlight on a calm sea, but, whatever the current status of the person who was taken off the boat a few hours ago, there has been considerable pain and sadness aboard the Ovation of the Seas today.
One wonders if the medical personnel on board were not aware that there was at least one very worthy phallushood holder on board. Surely with his vial of supernatural healing oil at the ready.
Perhaps in the future, Dan might want to notify the captain that such a valuable resource is available. It could save a life!
Re: "Is there a priesthood holder on board?"
Posted: Sun Feb 18, 2024 1:51 am
by Philo Sofee
ONLY to be had for the already worthies of Mormondom, and ONLY within their own sacred precincts away from prying eyes, and ONLY for those who have the faith not to be healed.....
Re: "Is there a priesthood holder on board?"
Posted: Sun Feb 18, 2024 3:34 am
by Everybody Wang Chung
In all fairness to DCP, he was blissfully unaware of the tragedy unfolding on the cruise ship because he was enjoying the chocolate buffet on the poop deck.
DCP pictured here in a recent New Zealand police sketch:

Re: "Is there a priesthood holder on board?"
Posted: Mon Feb 19, 2024 12:42 pm
by IWMP
I was expecting a story about someone asking for a blessing. This is sad.
Re: "Is there a priesthood holder on board?"
Posted: Tue Feb 20, 2024 11:54 pm
by Philo Sofee
Imwashingmypirate wrote: ↑Mon Feb 19, 2024 12:42 pm
I was expecting a story about someone asking for a blessing. This is sad.
Not much anymore. Now that they are apostolically hinted to in NOT having the faith to be healed, what's the point? Priesthood is merely a place holder, a badge for something or other to elevate those who hold it into thinking Elohimhood is right around the corner for them. In the meantime, "1, 2, 3, Lets go shopping!" Lets keep focused on the important stuff here brethren!
Re: "Is there a priesthood holder on board?"
Posted: Wed Feb 21, 2024 12:29 am
by IWMP
Philo Sofee wrote: ↑Tue Feb 20, 2024 11:54 pm
Imwashingmypirate wrote: ↑Mon Feb 19, 2024 12:42 pm
I was expecting a story about someone asking for a blessing. This is sad.
Not much anymore. Now that they are apostolically hinted to in NOT having the faith to be healed, what's the point? Priesthood is merely a place holder, a badge for something or other to elevate those who hold it into thinking Elohimhood is right around the corner for them. In the meantime, "1, 2, 3, Lets go shopping!" Lets keep focused on the important stuff here brethren!
What do you mean by 1, 2, 3 let's go shopping? I think I get the jist of what you are saying. Blessings gave me comfort but they were generally comfort blessings. I have had oil on my head before. Can't remember exactly why. My patriarchal blessing kinda sucked. I had it in a room with a friend who also got hers and so I heard hers too and he was kind of new to the calling but our blessings were so similar it disappointed me lol. I vaguely recall mine talking about needing to avoid antimormon literature which turned out to be something I did end up perusing lol.
Re: "Is there a priesthood holder on board?"
Posted: Wed Feb 21, 2024 1:35 am
by drumdude
Imwashingmypirate wrote: ↑Wed Feb 21, 2024 12:29 am
Philo Sofee wrote: ↑Tue Feb 20, 2024 11:54 pm
Not much anymore. Now that they are apostolically hinted to in NOT having the faith to be healed, what's the point? Priesthood is merely a place holder, a badge for something or other to elevate those who hold it into thinking Elohimhood is right around the corner for them. In the meantime, "1, 2, 3, Lets go shopping!" Lets keep focused on the important stuff here brethren!
What do you mean by 1, 2, 3 let's go shopping? I think I get the jist of what you are saying. Blessings gave me comfort but they were generally comfort blessings. I have had oil on my head before. Can't remember exactly why. My patriarchal blessing kinda sucked. I had it in a room with a friend who also got hers and so I heard hers too and he was kind of new to the calling but our blessings were so similar it disappointed me lol. I vaguely recall mine talking about needing to avoid antimormon literature which turned out to be something I did end up perusing lol.
"Lets go shopping" is a reference to the church leaders opening the city creek mall.
Re: "Is there a priesthood holder on board?"
Posted: Wed Feb 21, 2024 7:54 am
by Dr. Shades
Imwashingmypirate wrote: ↑Wed Feb 21, 2024 12:29 am
Philo Sofee wrote: ↑Tue Feb 20, 2024 11:54 pm
In the meantime, "1, 2, 3, Lets go shopping!"
What do you mean by 1, 2, 3 let's go shopping?
Have a look and see. Although it's blurry, that's Thomas S. Monson, the previous prophet, behind the ribbon:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cf-_vxsog4A
Re: "Is there a priesthood holder on board?"
Posted: Wed Feb 21, 2024 11:05 am
by IWMP
drumdude wrote: ↑Wed Feb 21, 2024 1:35 am
Imwashingmypirate wrote: ↑Wed Feb 21, 2024 12:29 am
What do you mean by 1, 2, 3 let's go shopping? I think I get the jist of what you are saying. Blessings gave me comfort but they were generally comfort blessings. I have had oil on my head before. Can't remember exactly why. My patriarchal blessing kinda sucked. I had it in a room with a friend who also got hers and so I heard hers too and he was kind of new to the calling but our blessings were so similar it disappointed me lol. I vaguely recall mine talking about needing to avoid antimormon literature which turned out to be something I did end up perusing lol
"Let’s go shopping" is a reference to the church leaders opening the city creek mall.
Ahhh.

oh dear. I was surprised by the stocks. This to me proves more against the church than the Joseph Smith stuff. We were always taught to be in the world but not of the world. This is the complete opposite. Christianity shouldn't be about business. Oh well.