Sibling relationships

[Jersey Girl]

RI when I said I was guarding my heart, I meant I was guarding my feelings. Not my physical heart. Thank you.

[Some Schmo]

I rejected calling my sister that I'm very close to because I didn't want to betray a family member here. I don't have anyone in my life like me...for me. If that even makes sense. But she comes close. I struggle with feeling like I'm betraying confidence of someone I love.

I meant to comment on this.

This is one of those situations where no matter what you do, you hurt someone. Whether it's a family member of a friend, you've got to be honest with them. You don't want to get in the middle of their rift because you care about both of them and you don't want to take a side. I think the loving thing to do here is the positive act, not the negative one. There's a chance by not going to see the baby, you may have hurt grandma. Does your sister really care about your wellbeing if she would deny you the opportunity to see the baby?

I just don't see that as a betrayal, unless your "caring" sister expects you to cut all ties with your "stoic" sister, and you agree.

[Jersey Girl]

I rejected calling my sister that I'm very close to because I didn't want to betray a family member here. I don't have anyone in my life like me...for me. If that even makes sense. But she comes close. I struggle with feeling like I'm betraying confidence of someone I love.

I meant to comment on this.

This is one of those situations where no matter what you do, you hurt someone. Whether it's a family member of a friend, you've got to be honest with them. You don't want to get in the middle of their rift because you care about both of them and you don't want to take a side. I think the loving thing to do here is the positive act, not the negative one. There's a chance by not going to see the baby, you may have hurt grandma. Does your sister really care about your wellbeing if she would deny you the opportunity to see the baby?

I just don't see that as a betrayal, unless your "caring" sister expects you to cut all ties with your "stoic" sister, and you agree.

In an effort to be discreet, I think I didn't make myself clear enough in the post you're replying to. I sequed into an entirely different issue that has to do with my immediate family right here. That is why it sounded confusing to you. I tried dipping my toes in the water of understanding by asking about sibling relationships, but it's not limited to that type of relationship only, it involves ALL of our family here. When I wrote about not talking to my sister about it, I am saying I didn't want to betray a family member right here by discussing it outside the family.

I shouldn't have said anything at all because I'm clearly messing it up and I don't want to give details publicly.

The irony is that if any person that I know in real life or on this board, were to present a problem/dilemma/challenge/crisis to me I would clearly see a couple or three options or pathways to suggest. That's because I would be outside of the issues and be able to view things with more objectivity. The problem right now is that I've exhausted all pathways and I've hit a brick wall. I swing back and forth between having my head on straight, then falling apart over it.

More clear as mud coming from me, I know. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have even tried posting about it.

[Some Schmo]

I had reservations about posting that, Jersey Girl, because I suspected there was a lot I didn't know. The devil is in the details. Sorry you're going through this.

I decided to post based on what I read and let you clarify if you so wanted. I left out a lot in my initial post for the sake of discretion, too, so I understand.