doubtingthomas wrote: ↑Mon Apr 24, 2023 5:18 am
Res Ipsa wrote: ↑Mon Apr 24, 2023 4:41 am
No, I don’t. If you don’t have the cognitive ability to define your own terms, I don’t have the patience to address your infantile reasoning.
Gadianton thinks that I want society to give me a young girlfriend.
You guys always have to make it about me. Perhaps you and the others don't have the cognitive ability to understand what I am saying.
I've clarified countless of times on many threads that I am talking about young men around 18 to 22 and maybe 13 to 22 on this occasion. Is it right for students to reject a classmate? Think of your kids. How would you feel if your child was socially excluded? I was lonely when I was a young man in my late teens and early 20s and I am still pretty lonely to this day, I know how it feels.
Marcus wrote: ↑Mon Apr 24, 2023 4:00 am
What does "give the lonely guys some friends" mean?
It doesn't mean that I want society to give me some friends. "give the lonely guys some friends" is clearly figurative speech. What does that mean? You can interpret that like any reasonable person would.
It’s not my job (or Marcus’s) to define your terms for you. You are the one one who used the words “rejected by society” and “give the lonely guy some friends.” If you don’t understand what you mean by those terms, maybe you should use other terms.
I was a tiny kid with a big mouth. I was bullied quite a bit, so I understand rejection. But I didn’t react with aggression or anti-social behavior. Oddly enough, reacting to rejection with anti-social behavior and aggression is a 100% counter productive strategy. Part of the puzzle psychologists are trying to figure out why people would react to rejection with behavior that will make them more likely to be rejected in the future.
Should children be taught to accept children who are different from them. Absolutely. Should children who have trouble with social skills be given instruction in how to improve those skills? Absolutely. Should schools both and expect and require a basic level of civil treatment of others? Certainly.
Will any of that prevent kids from being mean to each other? Probably not. Can we guarantee that no one will ever suffer social rejection? Nope. Should we teach children how to be resilient in the face of rejection. Absolutely.
I’m sorry you feel lonely today. Even when I had the crap bullied out of me growing up, I always had a friend or two. We weren’t the cool kids, but we hung out together and learned how to develop friendships. No one taught us — we just fumbled our way through it.
At this stage of your life, if you feel lonely and you want to have some friends, it’s going to be up to you to learn how to develop friendships and put in the time and effort it takes to do so. You can quote all the studies you want, but the only person who can change your circumstances is you. And every article you cite for the proposition that it’s someone else’s fault Is a step backwards.
You’ve been given dozens and dozens of good ideas for developing a social life. Pick a few and put them action.
