The acceptability of using the word 'retarded'

[_keene]

Yanno Keene I certainly hope you never have a child with a disability. I don't really consider my daughter disabled. There have been nobel prize winners that have Asperger's Syndrome (Einstein is thought to have had this 'disability' as well) and just that they are not neuro-typical brings scorn upon these unique individuals.

I am rather fond of ALL persons regardless of how they choose to communicate and relish each and every opportunity to interact with them. I LOVE them!

Anyway, no guilt intended here! Trying to transmit the pure joy that is found in helping another human tap into their potentials!

Don't get me wrong, I love retards just as much as I love anyone else. I just don't like how everyone makes a big pity machine over it, and no one's allowed to enjoy themselves anymore.

When I was little, my friend's older sister was retarded, to the point where she was basically a one year old stuck in a 17 year old body. I used to hang out with her at this retard-only school near my house. I met and befriended just about every retard in the city. In most cases, they're better people than most average adults I've met.

And they all loved a good retard joke. Until their parents or siblings came around and yelled about how horrible it was to make fun of them. But they all knew, it wasn't about making fun of them -- they couldn't choose what happened to them, but that doesn't change the fact that it's funny as hell!

I've never felt an ounce of pity for retards, or their families. Those are the hands they were dealt, and they're going to have to live with it, and bless 'em if they want to try. But by forcing pity, either through guilt or sorrow, in order to make their way through life -- well that's wrong no matter who you are.

My parents were assigned to look after an autistic girl in nursery. They hated every minute of it. And any time any autistic joke came around, they got huffy and insisted that everyone feel so bad for this autistic girl.

Well, one day I went in and helped them, and I made fun of her for doing stupid things. I didn't discount it on "oh, it's the autism, better be careful." No, I teased her, and laughed at her, and somewhere, a switch was flipped -- she stopped doing the things my parents hated so much, like banging her head against the walls and floors, and she started doing things for the purpose of making me laugh. I have to admit, it was weird, seeing as she wouldn't look at me, or in most cases even acknoledge my existance, but my laughter and teasing brought out a happier person.

Haha! TAKE THAT, punks! The guilt works both ways!!

[_keene]

keene

Jersey Girl, the way you USED that retard is awful. The way you used his condition in order to create a guilty feeling in someone else -- you are using his misfortune to manipulate someone else to feel bad. THAT IS WAY MORE OFFENSIVE than even the worst retard joke.

What retard?

Again: Retard means slow. He's slow at speaking, considering how much effort it took. By definition he's a retard.

Not a bad thing, unless you make it one, like, say, using the story to bring out a feeling of guilt or shame in others.

[_Jersey Girl]

keene

Jersey Girl, the way you USED that retard is awful. The way you used his condition in order to create a guilty feeling in someone else -- you are using his misfortune to manipulate someone else to feel bad. THAT IS WAY MORE OFFENSIVE than even the worst retard joke.

What retard?

Again: Retard means slow. He's slow at speaking, considering how much effort it took. By definition he's a retard.

Not a bad thing, unless you make it one, like, say, using the story to bring out a feeling of guilt or shame in others.

He's slow at speaking? Where did you get that from? Slow in what way?

[_keene]

keene

Jersey Girl, the way you USED that retard is awful. The way you used his condition in order to create a guilty feeling in someone else -- you are using his misfortune to manipulate someone else to feel bad. THAT IS WAY MORE OFFENSIVE than even the worst retard joke.

What retard?

Again: Retard means slow. He's slow at speaking, considering how much effort it took. By definition he's a retard.

Not a bad thing, unless you make it one, like, say, using the story to bring out a feeling of guilt or shame in others.

He's slow at speaking? Where did you get that from? Slow in what way?

People, who like the parents of the child described above, would celebrate over just three meaningful words and the effort that formed them.

Were you purposefully being unclear?

[_barrelomonkeys]

Yanno Keene I certainly hope you never have a child with a disability. I don't really consider my daughter disabled. There have been nobel prize winners that have Asperger's Syndrome (Einstein is thought to have had this 'disability' as well) and just that they are not neuro-typical brings scorn upon these unique individuals.

I am rather fond of ALL persons regardless of how they choose to communicate and relish each and every opportunity to interact with them. I LOVE them!

Anyway, no guilt intended here! Trying to transmit the pure joy that is found in helping another human tap into their potentials!

Don't get me wrong, I love retards just as much as I love anyone else. I just don't like how everyone makes a big pity machine over it, and no one's allowed to enjoy themselves anymore.

When I was little, my friend's older sister was retarded, to the point where she was basically a one year old stuck in a 17 year old body. I used to hang out with her at this retard-only school near my house. I met and befriended just about every retard in the city. In most cases, they're better people than most average adults I've met.

And they all loved a good retard joke. Until their parents or siblings came around and yelled about how horrible it was to make fun of them. But they all knew, it wasn't about making fun of them -- they couldn't choose what happened to them, but that doesn't change the fact that it's funny as hell!

I've never felt an ounce of pity for retards, or their families. Those are the hands they were dealt, and they're going to have to live with it, and bless 'em if they want to try. But by forcing pity, either through guilt or sorrow, in order to make their way through life -- well that's wrong no matter who you are.

My parents were assigned to look after an autistic girl in nursery. They hated every minute of it. And any time any autistic joke came around, they got huffy and insisted that everyone feel so bad for this autistic girl.

Well, one day I went in and helped them, and I made fun of her for doing stupid things. I didn't discount it on "oh, it's the autism, better be careful." No, I teased her, and laughed at her, and somewhere, a switch was flipped -- she stopped doing the things my parents hated so much, like banging her head against the walls and floors, and she started doing things for the purpose of making me laugh. I have to admit, it was weird, seeing as she wouldn't look at me, or in most cases even acknoledge my existance, but my laughter and teasing brought out a happier person.

Haha! TAKE THAT, punks! The guilt works both ways!!

I don't care if anyone has fun Keene. My story was not meant to bring guilt to anyone. I was merely sharing a story because I thought it was story time?!

What stupid things was the girl with autism doing Keene? Banging her head? Yanno that's called stimming and it is something we all do... you do it too Keene. We all release tension in different ways. Persons with autism just do it in a way outside the norm. Anyway... yer not irritating me yet. ;)

Nice try. ;P

[_Jersey Girl]

keene

Jersey Girl, the way you USED that retard is awful. The way you used his condition in order to create a guilty feeling in someone else -- you are using his misfortune to manipulate someone else to feel bad. THAT IS WAY MORE OFFENSIVE than even the worst retard joke.

What retard?

Again: Retard means slow. He's slow at speaking, considering how much effort it took. By definition he's a retard.

Not a bad thing, unless you make it one, like, say, using the story to bring out a feeling of guilt or shame in others.

He's slow at speaking? Where did you get that from? Slow in what way?

People, who like the parents of the child described above, would celebrate over just three meaningful words and the effort that formed them.

Were you purposefully being unclear?

No. What do you mean by "slow"? Slow in what way?

[_keene]

I don't care if anyone has fun Keene. My story was not meant to bring guilt to anyone. I was merely sharing a story because I thought it was story time?!

What stupid things was the girl with autism doing Keene? Banging her head? Yanno that's called stimming and it is something we all do... you do it too Keene. We all release tension in different ways. Persons with autism just do it in a way outside the norm. Anyway... yer not irritating me yet. ;)

Nice try. ;P

Oh silly monkeys, I enjoyed your story and it didn't bring guilt, or even smack of the intention. My story was more intended at the concept, than at any single person.

The things my parents had issues with were her kicking and screaming, and her banging her head around. Usually they tried to stop it the same way they tried to keep me in the church -- yell a lot, and then use force. They told me of many the day where they spent the entire time just sitting on this girl to keep her from hurting herself or anyone.

So maybe just the fact that I held my parents back cheered her up, but I held them back by making fun of them, too, so the attitude was always honest. I think she sensed that I wasn't going to treat her any differently -- I don't know, she didn't really feel the need to communicate. But I teased her like I tease any of my friends.

[_keene]

No. What do you mean by "slow"? Slow in what way?

If you weren't purposefully being unclear, then you were unclear unpurposefully.

Your statements come across as the child having to make a larger-than-normal effort to formulate words -- given the context of retardation in the thread, the assumption is made that this child has to use that effort because of a retardation.

Perhaps you'd like to clarify?

[_barrelomonkeys]

I don't care if anyone has fun Keene. My story was not meant to bring guilt to anyone. I was merely sharing a story because I thought it was story time?!

What stupid things was the girl with autism doing Keene? Banging her head? Yanno that's called stimming and it is something we all do... you do it too Keene. We all release tension in different ways. Persons with autism just do it in a way outside the norm. Anyway... yer not irritating me yet. ;)

Nice try. ;P

Oh silly monkeys, I enjoyed your story and it didn't bring guilt, or even smack of the intention. My story was more intended at the concept, than at any single person.

The things my parents had issues with were her kicking and screaming, and her banging her head around. Usually they tried to stop it the same way they tried to keep me in the church -- yell a lot, and then use force. They told me of many the day where they spent the entire time just sitting on this girl to keep her from hurting herself or anyone.

So maybe just the fact that I held my parents back cheered her up, but I held them back by making fun of them, too, so the attitude was always honest. I think she sensed that I wasn't going to treat her any differently -- I don't know, she didn't really feel the need to communicate. But I teased her like I tease any of my friends.

I am such a silly monkey! ;P

Oh! Yelling at a child with autism can only aggravate them usually. They're usually very sensitive to stimuli... I think you probably did a wonderful job with her!

Another story! Woop!

There was a young boy with 'low' functioning autism that I had the pleasure to meet a few months ago. He didn't usually like being touched (stimuli!) and I was playing with another little girl by pretending my finger was a bumble bee. I'd go "buzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz" while whirling my finger in the air and then go in for a tickle.

This young man walked up behind me with his 'bumble bee' and started to tickle me! I then did the 'bumble bee' to him and he LOVED it! I've been told he's been doing it ever since!

It's so interesting sometimes how we stumble across how to interact with each individual as if they are individuals and forget the manuals!

Loved your story Keene!

[_Jersey Girl]

No. What do you mean by "slow"? Slow in what way?

If you weren't purposefully being unclear, then you were unclear unpurposefully.

Your statements come across as the child having to make a larger-than-normal effort to formulate words -- given the context of retardation in the thread, the assumption is made that this child has to use that effort because of a retardation.

Perhaps you'd like to clarify?

One more time...

What do you mean by "slow"? Slow in what way?