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I'm Not A Monster
Posted: Thu Jul 24, 2008 5:33 pm
by _Moniker
The trauma is finished.... yet, I'm not a monster. I went into a high state of hypervigilance (fear of attack which causes me to not sleep -- I suffer from PTSD and sometimes it rears up when I fear attack) and did some things I normally wouldn't do. The person that takes over when I'm in that state is anxious, on high alert, and is desperately seeking to protect themselves. My thought processes (and that is displayed in some of the things I write, at times) dramatically change when I'm like that. After I came out of that state of mind I felt guilty for acting in that way. Yet, my body absolutely takes over who I usually am because I'm in battle fight or flight mode. I was so confused and overwhelmed... yet, I'm not now. I'm not a monster. Yet, I'm not perfect.
Posted: Thu Jul 24, 2008 5:59 pm
by _GoodK
I don't get it...
Posted: Thu Jul 24, 2008 8:58 pm
by _Angus McAwesome
Jesus... This board is just one giant drama factory.
Posted: Thu Jul 24, 2008 9:30 pm
by _Moniker
GoodK wrote:I don't get it...
It was about being stuck in a loop of trauma. Then breaking it.
Posted: Thu Jul 24, 2008 9:51 pm
by _Jersey Girl
I'm a little confused by this thread but so far, I'm okay with it.
:-)
Posted: Thu Jul 24, 2008 10:45 pm
by _Dr. Shades
Why do you delete your posts so often?
Posted: Fri Jul 25, 2008 5:11 am
by _The Nehor
Moniker wrote:GoodK wrote:I don't get it...
It was about being stuck in a loop of trauma that I created for myself. Then breaking it.
Hooray! I think....
This is a good think, right?
Posted: Fri Jul 25, 2008 8:06 am
by _Boaz & Lidia
What do Moniker and Crocket have in common?
They both need to be taken to the bar.
Posted: Fri Jul 25, 2008 4:41 pm
by _GoodK
Moniker wrote:GoodK wrote:I don't get it...
It was about being stuck in a loop of trauma that I created for myself. Then breaking it.
I see... I'm glad you worked it out.
I agree with B&L, happy hour :)
Posted: Fri Jul 25, 2008 5:00 pm
by _Yoda
Angus McAwesome wrote:Jesus... This board is just one giant drama factory.
Welcome to Shady Acres! LOL