LDS and ex-LDS Self-Medication

[_Gazelam]

Monkeys stated:

Now I'm certain that you don't want me to join the LDS Church and then have to deal with sexual repression, bizarre indoctrination and what not? Are YOU really suggesting that you think ANYONE that was never a part of the Church would be jealous (or desire to be) of one of you?

1) Sexual repression. This is silly. Is it wrong to ask for youth to wait until they are married to have sex? Is abstinance outside of marriage wrong? People withen marriage are free to enjoy it, and withen marriage they are simply asked to keep it sacred, not involving pornography and so called "Adult Toys". How is this repressed?

2) Bizzare indoctrination: Could you clarify what part you see as bizzare? This may require a new thread.

[_Polygamy Porter]

Book of Mormon has her own issues completely unrelated to Mormonism. Too bad she has not found a board to deal with those issues.

I just do not understand why nevermos would remain on this board as long and frequent as Book of Mormon and Jersey Girl.

Perhaps she and other nevermos are living vicariously through the lives of exmormons on this board?

[_Jersey Girl]

monkeys

Well of course Jersey Girl! I geddit. I just don't like being told by ex-Mos (and this has happened so many times on this board) that I desire to be one of them?

It is absurd. I get that they are struggling and can relate to their need to socialize and leave the old culture behind. That being said, I don't appreciate Porter and his constant need to insinuate that I would EVER want to be one of 'them'.

They are struggling with acceptance and attempting to forge a new path for themselves and figure out their new identities.

I just don't understand why Porter would assume I would want that same struggle. To me, it looks like it is a frenzy to make up for lost time... and it's sort of odd to watch. I mean it just is Jersey Girl! Perhaps they don't realize how strange it looks to an outsider?

Being in your 30's and 40's and trying to catch up on teenager/young adult experiences has to be something that is difficult. I wonder if they do sort of egg each other on though that these things MUST be caught up on? It appears from watching the social dynamics that social status may be rewarded by how much of a rebel ex-Mo they are now? I understand they're trying to feel 'normal'. I totally understand!

I just don't wanna ever have to do what they're doing. Yanno? And why Porter is so oblivious to this stuns me!

I agree that it's sort of odd to watch, monkeys. I suppose that when one has been living under a plethora of prohibitions (no alcohol, drugs, cigs, coffee, cussing, internet "anti" sites (!), read only this, watch only that, wear only these things, don't pierce your ears, no tatt's. etc.,) and when one decides that the system under which they've been living is bunk, there is likely a mind set that says " Oh yeah? You can't stop me now!" Heck! I'd throw on a halter top and light up on my way to Starbucks, too!

One thing about Porter. You'll have to look back to the post of yours that he replied to to confirm this...he usually says something like that "why do you want to be one of us?" or "You're not one of us" or asks "what are you doing here?" when challngened by a never-Mo. When the spotlight is shone in his face, he grabs it and turns it on you. Give the guy a break, it's all he's got.

:-D

[_Jersey Girl]

monkeys

Why don't you ask Bond why he hangs about?

Because Bond never challenges PP directly. That's why.

[_Jason Bourne]

Harmony, I have problems with PP beating people over the head for whatever. What's that saying you all throw about? Something about something being in your own eye? I think that would be applicable here.

Pull the beam out of your own eye (a beam is really big) before you pull a mote (which is really teeny) out of another's eye. Jesus said this.

Now Book of Mormon, have you not yet figured that PP is not as happy as he claims, that he is mostly a ranting idiot and that he really is more obsessed about the LDS Church now then he was when he was a member. You need to realize this when he rants and raves at you.

[_barrelomonkeys]

I agree that it's sort of odd to watch, monkeys. I suppose that when one has been living under a plethora of prohibitions (no alcohol, drugs, cigs, coffee, cussing, internet "anti" sites (!), read only this, watch only that, wear only these things, don't pierce your ears, no tatt's. etc.,) and when one decides that the system under which they've been living is bunk, there is likely a mind set that says " Oh yeah? You can't stop me now! Heck1 I'd throw on a halter top and light up on my way to Starbucks, too!

One thing about Porter. You'll have to look back to the post of yours that he replied to to confirm this...he usually says something like that "why do you want to be one of us?" or "You're not one of us" or asks "what are you doing here?" when challngened by a never-Mo. When the spotlight is shone in his face, he grabs it and turns it on you. Give the guy a break, it's all he's got.

:-D

Well what gets me is that it's always US? I mean really. Does PP think that ex-mos are 'normal' in the traditional sense? Seems like this board is a meeting ground to discuss how screwed up they are from their experience in the Church. And then when you mention it there's a knee jerk.

I know I'm abnormal. But I'm good with it! :D

[_Polygamy Porter]

I missed out on some of the things I should have experienced, because of the choices I made. I listen to the new Brooks and Dunn song about being proud of the house we made... and I remember how young I was when I got married, how unprepared, how vulnerable, how insecure... and I never want my kids to go through that. But making that decision wasn't a totally bad thing. Because of that, I never experienced a hangover, never had to abort an unplanned pregnancy, never wondered where my next meal was coming from, never blew my money on drugs or binge drinking. I never had a police record, never got addicted to nicotine, never worried about a sexually transmitted disease. So maybe it's not all bad.

I agree, some people NEED structured religion telling them how to live their lives.

However, there are MANY who never lived lived a day in any religion and have had even less problems than you throughout their lives. Adherents to religion are not the only people to make wise choices, and conversely, non religious people are not the only ones to make bad choices.

Keep in mind it is hard to find people like this if you are buried in the middle of a religious area, Mormon or other. Living in Utah and Idaho made it difficult to see outside of the LDS society without a biased view of perceived non religious people.

Moving to California changed my world view. I now have long term relationships with friends that are from all walks of life including Atheists, feminists, unwed couples who have lived together for 15-20 years and gay/lesbian people and couples. There is good and bad everywhere, religion attempts to make it appear that they have the corner on the market of good.

[_barrelomonkeys]

Harmony, I have problems with PP beating people over the head for whatever. What's that saying you all throw about? Something about something being in your own eye? I think that would be applicable here.

Pull the beam out of your own eye (a beam is really big) before you pull a mote (which is really teeny) out of another's eye. Jesus said this.

Now Book of Mormon, have you not yet figured that PP is not as happy as he claims, that he is mostly a ranting idiot and that he really is more obsessed about the LDS Church now then he was when he was a member. You need to realize this when he rants and raves at you.

Well I know that PP has been incredibly cruel to me when I was an emotional wreck. And at other times very kind. I don't know what his deal is.

But I'm not an emotional wreck anymore and tired of the ridiculousness. Just because I CHOOSE not to be cruel does not mean I can't.

I don't think PP is happy at all... and I'm sorry for that.

[_barrelomonkeys]

monkeys

Why don't you ask Bond why he hangs about?

Because Bond never challenges PP directly. That's why.

Right I've noticed he never mentions Bond. :)

[_barrelomonkeys]

Monkeys stated:

Now I'm certain that you don't want me to join the LDS Church and then have to deal with sexual repression, bizarre indoctrination and what not? Are YOU really suggesting that you think ANYONE that was never a part of the Church would be jealous (or desire to be) of one of you?

1) Sexual repression. This is silly. Is it wrong to ask for youth to wait until they are married to have sex? Is abstinance outside of marriage wrong? People withen marriage are free to enjoy it, and withen marriage they are simply asked to keep it sacred, not involving pornography and so called "Adult Toys". How is this repressed?

2) Bizzare indoctrination: Could you clarify what part you see as bizzare? This may require a new thread.

Hi Gaz. I believe it IS wrong to tell people that masturbation is a sin. It is VERY, VERY, VERY WRONG! And sets people up for a lifetime of shame for feeling about their body as a tool of torture rather than pleasure. The sexual bizarro I see on this board indicates this is indeed alive and well in LDS and ex-LDS.

I think adult toys are God's gift to me... if I believed in God. :) There's nothing wrong with toys. Why do you think they are? To heighten the sexual experience between two loving, intimate partners?

I'm good with porno too......

Well the indoctrination to believe that you will have to live up to a certain standard (never quite good enough) to be with your family in heaven is something I believe could be very harmful for many people. I can't imagine how terrifying that is to children!