Ambushed

[_Lucretia MacEvil]

It stems from the fact that as members - and more specifically as missionaries - the LDS church teaches that if you don't do EVERYTHING you can to convert people (or bring them back to the fold) then you'll be held accountable in the next life. That was actually one of my mission president's favorite things to say. Fear can be a motivator sometimes.

To hell with the fact that someone says they're on the DNC list. To hell with the fact that the person is busy, or is eating dinner. We're talking about saving lives here! Especially my own! Don't you realize guys? Those missionaries need to go home with a clear conscience.

Maybe ex-mormons should make a practice of dropping in on ward members, you know, just to say, "hi, even though I'm not a Mormon any more, I still care about you. Are you getting along okay? Is there anything I can do for you? Any questions I can answer? If I can't answer them, I could come back later with Dr. Shades. No? Would you like to bring your family over to the house and watch videos of the RFM Conference? No? Well, I'll be in touch. Love ya and miss ya!"

[_beastie]

With the vast majority of people, it is a given that people who have requested NOT to be contacted by a certain group ought to have their wishes respected. And when their wishes are not respected, they have a right to be disgruntled about it.

To pretend that this normal disgruntlement indicates something darker, or disturbed, is nonsense that would be peddled nowhere but in the context of a religion who claims to know what's good for you, even if you disagree.

I actually had my name formally removed from church rolls because I figured that was the only way I wouldn't be constantly pestered. And yes, it is a form of pestering when it happens over and over. In addition, when I had my name removed, I requested no contact. I had already shared my decision with anyone whom I felt needed to know the details. Even that didn't work, and I still get contacted now and then, and the people who contact me act as if my name is right there on their rolls. I've even called SLC to make sure my name is off the rolls. Yes, it is, they claim, and can't tell me why it still shows up on rolls. It can't be old rolls, because I was called by the Relief Society president of a brand new ward, within whose boundaries I would live, if I were still LDS.

I've never been rude in response, but I do think I would be justified in being extremely blunt if I so chose. My clear, distinct, wishes are being ignored, and I have done everything possible to make my wishes clear and known. Heck, I'm not even supposed to be on their rolls. My children have never been baptized, so it's not due to their names being on the rolls.

[_Blixa]

Does your grandma walk into people's kitchens, Nehor? Did your missionary companion stick his foot in the door? My point being, yes, there are annoying people of all stripes. But I really do think there is a particular disrespect for boundaries that is encouraged in the LDS church.

Which doesn't mean, of course, that there also aren't some perfectly tactful individual Mormons.

[Guest]

Does your grandma walk into people's kitchens, Nehor? Did your missionary companion stick his foot in the door? My point being, yes, there are annoying people of all stripes. But I really do think there is a particular disrespect for boundaries that is encouraged in the LDS church.

Which doesn't mean, of course, that there also aren't some perfectly tactful individual Mormons.

Yeah, but those people are worse jerks. I have never heard a Leader condone or encourage any such behavior. I knew one Missionary who used the foot-in-door method and was privy to the tongue-lashing he got when the President found out. He was chastened strongly. I think the reason it seems so common in the LDS church is that Missionaries are teenagers (i.e. morons).

[_beastie]

Yeah, but those people are worse jerks. I have never heard a Leader condone any such behavior. I knew one Missionary who used the foot-in-door method and was privy to the tongue-lashing he got when the President found out. I think the reason it seems so common in the LDS church is that we've sent out moronic teenagers.

That's true, but there have been some royal jerks who have served as mission presidents too. I'll have to try and remember to double check this with my boyfriend, but I'm pretty sure he told me that not only was the foot in the door a common technique in their mission, but it was openly condoned by the leaders.

[_Blixa]

I should say though, Nehor, that my understanding of and sympathy for missionaries has been greatly improved by my experiences on the "dreaded" RfM. Growing up I never knew any missionaries---I stayed away from them, thinking they were all jerks. But RfM taught me that my assumptions were not entirely correct and that the reasons for going on a mission can be complicated and not entirely in one's control.

At one time I would have never believed I would be talking to RMs, let alone counting some among my dearest friends...

[_moksha]

Moksha is never condescending. He is being just a tad pollyanna in this post though!

"The sun will come out, tomorrow
Bet your bottom dollar
That tomorrow, therell be sun
Jus thinkin about, tomorrow
Clears away the cobwebs and the sorrow
til theres none!!!"

[_Bond...James Bond]

Tomorrow! Tomorrow! I love ya Tomorrow! You're only a day away!.....

[_A Light in the Darkness]

It's 8 p.m. and the babysitter should be showing up any minute. A knock at the door. My wife comes upstairs stressed out. I'm just jumping out of the shower and putting on a shirt frustrated that I'm going to be the one to run downstairs and let the babysitter in. My wife doesn't know what Mormons are really, or have any concept of missionaries or even door to door proselyting. She's scared because 3 men in suits are at the door, is it INS or the FBI or something? At that point I had to laugh to myself. What timing. And what bureaucratic mixup. Afterall, I'd been getting letters regularily from the stake mentioning, "we realize that you've requested no contact, and we respect that, but we invite..."

So here I am at the door. One guy, silent. One guy a little older, over and over, trying to BRT by saying things like, "Hey, I understood you went on a mission to ...., I just got back from there." "Hey, what part of ... were you in?" Like, you know, the one free night my wife and I have all week (or more) with all kinds of pressures and stresses I'm just going to drop it all and say, "Oh yeah? Hey, come on in. Let's talk about ... while I let my wife sit on the sidelines. Maybe she'll feel the spirit and ask to be baptized huh? It's all so simple you know.

In between the older guy trying to make a connection, the senior comp is paroting, "Is there a better time we could come back?" "Is there a better time we could come back?" Even after I said, "Hey look, I don't have time for this now" or "I've got family things I"m taking care of", they just can't read between the lines and need the direct F-U answer. So I had to eventually tell them, "Can you please go, now. Leave." Like Adam directing Satan out of the Garden.

Oh I know, when I was a missionary, if a less active talked to me that way it was just fuel for the confrontation. I used to be nicer to missionaries having been there and knowing what it was like on their side. But know I'm learning what it's like on the side of normal, sane, non-cult indoctrinated people. And I hate to say it, but I understand why I got the door slammed in my face. And they were right to do so. Two years, wasted, in annoying normal people.

It looks like grayskull encountered some overly ambitious, and consequently sadly rude missionaries. It should happen less often than it does. People lose sight of priorities in their zealous devotion sometimes. However, Grayskull uses that encounter to leverage some bigoted shots at Mormons, contrasting the sane, normal world with "cult-indoctrinated" saints. He couldn't let the story pass without expressing the cancerous hate eating his mind. It's a strange refrain from an atheist, a person holding one of the most abnormal positions on religion and God on the planet.

[_Sam Harris]

Oh goodness, go take an enema!