The irony of forever families charade to never mo families

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_barrelomonkeys
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Post by _barrelomonkeys »

Chance of Divorce
33% of all first marriages end in separation or divorce after 10 years (32% of White women, 34% of hispanic women, and 47% of Black women).

Divorce is more likely when women marry at a younger age (48% of brides married before age 18 divorce in 10 years, compared to 24% married at age 25 or later), have a lower level of education, come from a single-parent home (12% more likely), were raped (same for all three ethnic groups), suffer from GAD, had a child before marriage or within 7 months of the marriage, and cohabitated before marriage (18% for non-cohabitators versus 24% for cohabitators)



http://www.psychpage.com/family/mod_cou ... x/cdc.html

Couples who get married without an intervening period of cohabitation have gotten early signals that they have a very good match," says Steven Stern, professor of economics at U.Va. and one of the co-authors of the new study.

"Others use a cohabitation period to learn more about their partners," Stern says. "If, once they've learned more, they find they have a good match, they marry; otherwise, they separate without incurring large divorce costs. On average, their matches are not as good and they have higher divorce rates."

"But it's not cohabitation that causes divorce," Stern emphasizes. "Rather, the people who cohabit are simply different from those who marry right away; their matches overall tend not to be as good. In fact, our study suggests that if there were less of a stigma associated with cohabitation and more people lived together before marriage, the divorce rate would fall because everyone would learn more about their partners' annoying habits before tying the knot."


http://www.virginia.edu/topnews/release ... -1999.html

COHABITATION FACTS

http://www.cdc.gov/nchs/data/series/sr_23/sr23_022.pdf
_Some Schmo
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Post by _Some Schmo »

barrelomonkeys wrote:
"But it's not cohabitation that causes divorce," Stern emphasizes. "Rather, the people who cohabit are simply different from those who marry right away; their matches overall tend not to be as good. In fact, our study suggests that if there were less of a stigma associated with cohabitation and more people lived together before marriage, the divorce rate would fall because everyone would learn more about their partners' annoying habits before tying the knot."


I get the feeling maybe these folks chalk it up to the fact that the type of people who are willing to live together out of wedlock are independent thinkers who don't care about the "stigma associated with cohabitation", and by nature are more likely to divorce due to their independent nature, rather than simply because they lived together.

That would be my guess, anyway.
God belief is for people who don't want to live life on the universe's terms.
_Jason Bourne
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Post by _Jason Bourne »

Some Schmo wrote:
barrelomonkeys wrote:
"But it's not cohabitation that causes divorce," Stern emphasizes. "Rather, the people who cohabit are simply different from those who marry right away; their matches overall tend not to be as good. In fact, our study suggests that if there were less of a stigma associated with cohabitation and more people lived together before marriage, the divorce rate would fall because everyone would learn more about their partners' annoying habits before tying the knot."


I get the feeling maybe these folks chalk it up to the fact that the type of people who are willing to live together out of wedlock are independent thinkers who don't care about the "stigma associated with cohabitation", and by nature are more likely to divorce due to their independent nature, rather than simply because they lived together.

That would be my guess, anyway.


Independent nature or inability to commit and work through tough times.
_Some Schmo
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Post by _Some Schmo »

Jason Bourne wrote:
Some Schmo wrote:
barrelomonkeys wrote:
"But it's not cohabitation that causes divorce," Stern emphasizes. "Rather, the people who cohabit are simply different from those who marry right away; their matches overall tend not to be as good. In fact, our study suggests that if there were less of a stigma associated with cohabitation and more people lived together before marriage, the divorce rate would fall because everyone would learn more about their partners' annoying habits before tying the knot."


I get the feeling maybe these folks chalk it up to the fact that the type of people who are willing to live together out of wedlock are independent thinkers who don't care about the "stigma associated with cohabitation", and by nature are more likely to divorce due to their independent nature, rather than simply because they lived together.

That would be my guess, anyway.


Independent nature or inability to commit and work through tough times.


What has an "inability to commit and work through tough times" got to do (uniquely) with people who live together before marriage?
God belief is for people who don't want to live life on the universe's terms.
_ozemc
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Post by _ozemc »

Some Schmo wrote:
Jason Bourne wrote:

- Trusting feelings over logic and sense


I have never ever heard such counsel.


Admittedly, this one may never be spoken aloud; but it is implied, without a doubt.



I would think that the idea that you are supposed to pray about the Book of Mormon and feel that "burning in the bosom" that it's true would qualify.
"What does God need with a starship?" - Captain James T. Kirk

Most people would like to be delivered from temptation but would like it to keep in touch. - Robert Orben
_Jason Bourne
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Post by _Jason Bourne »

Independent nature or inability to commit and work through tough times.


What has an "inability to commit and work through tough times" got to do (uniquely) with people who live together before marriage?


The comment was related to your remark that independent natured persons may be more likely to divorce. My point is that it may be more of an attitude of lack of committment.
_barrelomonkeys
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Post by _barrelomonkeys »

Not that Jason and Schmo asked me but I'll tell you what I believe the difference is. When couples cohabitate they are from backgrounds or in communities (for the most part) where they don't see this as sinful or against the grain. They are essentially in less of a traditional mindset and don't see the stigma that some people still see when people cohabitate. This lack of traditionalism carries over into their marriages. These same people (since they're not as concerned with the stigma's attached to throwing off traditional mores) aren't as concerned about the stigma of divorce and don't see their community as condemning them for a divorce.

My .02
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