barrelomonkeys wrote:Oh, I hope I didn't say that?? I don't think I did.
No, it wasn't you. This is the quote, from someone else:
I'd rather have sex with myself than put up with someone who has no clue what they're doing.
I wish I could get past the sex thing. Believe me, I'm trying. I have a great therapist. I agree with everything you said in your last post. Also, I just read a few of the exchanges on a thread in the telestial forum that may have spawned your original post here. I understand your frustration.
barrelomonkeys wrote:Oh, I hope I didn't say that?? I don't think I did.
No, it wasn't you. This is the quote, from someone else:
I'd rather have sex with myself than put up with someone who has no clue what they're doing.
I wish I could get past the sex thing. Believe me, I'm trying. I have a great therapist. I agree with everything you said in your last post. Also, I just read a few of the exchanges on a thread in the telestial forum that may have spawned your original post here. I understand your frustration.
Well I was incredibly frustrated. And saddened. :( Intensely saddened...
There's no secret to sex. I don't know that anyone 'really' knows what they're doing. I mean, some of us may think we do... well I sort of think I do. But really, it's about making that mental connection with someone else and wanting to explore with them.
If there's a woman that cares for you, and you her, it matters not what past experiences you've had or not had. That I have felt such shame for my sexual inhibitions actually causes me pain - and hesitancy. It's can work both ways. :(
Anyway, I just wish there wasn't all this pain associated with it. And I'm sorry now for my original thread title, because I should have clarified that I was speaking of only a few men on this board that say awful, heinous things to a woman because they just don't understand me and attribute their own skewed vision of life onto me.
silentkid wrote: This is the quote, from someone else:
I'd rather have sex with myself than put up with someone who has no clue what they're doing.
I wish I could get past the sex thing. Believe me, I'm trying. I have a great therapist. I agree with everything you said in your last post. Also, I just read a few of the exchanges on a thread in the telestial forum that may have spawned your original post here. I understand your frustration.
Damn! Whoever said that is not very bright. Why not get someone who you can teach to do it the way you want?
;)
Here's hoping you find a woman who appreciates you, Silentkid!
;)
Relax, though. For women, sex is more about the relationship than the actual act. If you focus on her and her needs, you'll do much better at getting what you want, too.
Just some advice from a 43 year old woman who's been married for almost 21 years.
For the record I don't think monkeys trolls this board for men, and it would appear obvious that she's quite attractive (read: she's gorgeous) enough to get a man if she is inclined to do so.
"Whatever appears to be against the Book of Mormon is going to be overturned at some time in the future. So we can be pretty open minded."-charity 3/7/07
silentkid wrote: This is the quote, from someone else:
I'd rather have sex with myself than put up with someone who has no clue what they're doing.
I wish I could get past the sex thing. Believe me, I'm trying. I have a great therapist. I agree with everything you said in your last post. Also, I just read a few of the exchanges on a thread in the telestial forum that may have spawned your original post here. I understand your frustration.
Damn! Whoever said that is not very bright. Why not get someone who you can teach to do it the way you want?
;)
Here's hoping you find a woman who appreciates you, Silentkid!
;)
Relax, though. For women, sex is more about the relationship than the actual act. If you focus on her and her needs, you'll do much better at getting what you want, too.
Just some advice from a 43 year old woman who's been married for almost 21 years.
;)
It was me who said that and I stand by it. it does not mean I am not very bright! I don't want a virgin and that's my choice. I want a man who has had sexual experiences and learnt from them what works and what doesn't. We all learn from our lovers what they like and what they don't, but I don't want someone inexperienced. Personal choice. My comment was also quite personal to me. Whether someone knows what they're doing, to me, means that they like the same kind of things as me. They like to take it slow, they are sensual, they are uninhibited. I'm sure that other women prefer other things and would be happy with a jackhammer tongue coming at them, or someone whose idea of sex was to pump as long and hard as they could, without enjoying the most important aspect of foreplay.
mormonmistress wrote:I don't want a virgin and that's my choice. I want a man who has had sexual experiences and learnt from them what works and what doesn't.
You're right, that is your choice. Women like you are the reason I'm so intimidated by finally trying to date outside of Mormonism (not saying that all Mormon women are virgins, but at least they understand where I'm coming from). No sexually experienced woman wants to be with a virgin. This irks me. I'm willing to learn what it takes to be a good sexual partner. But there has to be a starting point. You were a virgin once as well. Have some empathy.