Moniker wrote: I do not desire any sort of male sexual attention.
Frankly I don't believe you based on the posts of yours I've read, but it's not important one way or another to me, I'm only saying it appears to me you are playing dumb if you don't see why you illicit it, and I'm not saying you are illiciting lots of remarks on the board, I'm going by what you say you get in pm's.
Moniker wrote: I do not desire any sort of male sexual attention.
Frankly I don't believe you based on the posts of yours I've read, but it's not important one way or another to me, I'm only saying it appears to me you are playing dumb if you don't see why you illicit it, and I'm not saying you are illiciting lots of remarks on the board, I'm going by what you say you get in pm's.
I said why I get it! I've said it REPEATEDLY! Why do you say I play dumb when I clearly state WHY I am getting the attention I am?
Christ almighty, marg -- and you say I'm dumb? Me receiving the attention is not the same as WANTING the attention.
I do LESS explicit, sexual comeons on this site than a few other women. I do not go around asking men to join me in threads, I do not keep a picture up of myself, I do not go about inserting myself randomly into threads with sexual comments, I IGNORE most of the men that DO make comments to me. If I do say something to them it's usually a smart alleck remark or a smile 'cause I don't know what else to say.
I told stories in my blog when I wanted to relate something -- you had to read between the lines. People just interpreted it as they wished. This is for you, marg. :)
23 years old. Still in school at this point and enjoying the stimulation immensely. Crammed as much of the knowledge being offered into my mind and regurgitated it dutifully for each test, essay, and lecture. Eager!
Nasty (code name for ex-husband) was flying in often to see me and I was considering how forward he was acting. Not certain if I was ready for him to make the move. Not in love with him. I'd quit my waitressing job and was still doing paralegal work, yet, I needed a better paying job with less hours. Allowing him to take over of my finances was not wise. I needed to reel back in some of my ability to support myself, even while I was in school full time.
Temp agency!
They loved me at the temp agency. I was a speedy typist, dressed in suits, had an impressive amount of clerical work behind me, and was willing to start off with anything more than my current wages. They sent me off to a medical supply store that was hiring for an assistant position.
Dressed sharply that day. Perhaps my skirt was a bit short -- yet, I thought I was quite presentable. Walked in with my freshly dry cleaned suit and heels clacking to be met by two young men behind the counter. Briefly -- lots of smiles and chitter chatter. A middle aged woman clomps out from the back and gives me a brief up and down before extending her arm and motions for me to follow her. As we walk down the hall she asks if I've brought my resume. I have! She'll be interviewing me along with another man.
Escorted into an office where a gray haired gentleman is fiddling with some paperwork. He looks up and offers a gracious, welcoming smile and asks me to sit. I attempt to look relaxed while being anything but as the two sit across from me and size me up.
I smile, discuss my experience, am asked where I go to Church from the lady (I lie), bs why I would be perfect for the job (all the answers already planned out ahead of time), keep good eye contact... then the woman asks me, "Are you a party girl?"
Hmm..
"Well, I'm not certain what you mean?"
She wanted to know if I associate with my other colleagues outside of the work environment. I tell her that I have in the past. Gone out for drinks or dinner. She taps her fingers on the table as she looks over my resume.
"Where do you go to Church again?" she asks.
I lie again.
The man interjects something relevant to the position and my resume. I gladly turn my attention back to him.
The interview ends and she never looks at me as we stand. She follows me out and glares at the young men behind the counter as they silently bid me adieu.
You think I'm judging you about those things I said would attract sexual attention from guys, as if there is something wrong with that. No, that's not it. It's my observation, but frankly so what, it's not a big a deal nor a crime. But don't for example post a provocative avatar and then in a post to a guy say you have no idea why some guy said to you it was provocative. It's been a while since I read that post of yours, but that's what I'm getting at. I'm not saying what you do is wrong, I'm saying that what you do illicits the attention you say you get, no surprise.
You mentioned that interview, and I can understand from the interviewer's point of view that they might have perceived you as a potential problem in a company. I know the company that my husband worked for before retirement which was a large multinational company had difficulties in the eighties, between the sexes. There were a lot of sexual flings going on, male managers having sexual liasons with subordinate women, and it seemed the women didn't mind, they were part of it. A lot of people were fired. So I can understand from a company's point of view. You say you walked into an interview and maybe your skirt was a little short. You answered the question of whether you are a party girl with, that you have gone out for drinks and dinner after work. Well that was a learning experience to avoid the next time. The next time you say no you do not associate in off work activities or parties with associates unless it is part of a co. meeting or business function. Of course at the time, I understand you weren't expecting that question.
But quite frankly on this board from reading your posts and I never read your blog my impression was you wanted male attention, from all males not just one. And I didn't get that impression from mere mention of the word "sex". It was based on the little things you'd say which accululated over time to form a picture. It was the bits and pieces, not any one particular post. Just little things. i.e. something like..."I like men who are intelligent that turns me on" I remember you saying something to that effect in a thread I was involved in as was JAK. What do you expect when you say things like that. But that is just one small example. And as I said, it's not a big deal. But if you were really truly not wanting male attention, and that's a decision up to you, you wouldn't have posted any provocative avatars, for example. That's really quite an obvious clue. The latest one isn't particularly, though it's a little. It's a demure Hepburn. But many in the past have been more overt.
Moniker quite frankly you are extremely intelligent, and it's not a big deal whether you illicit the responses you say you do.
There are women you play up to men, and women who do not. It's not a question of right or wrong, unless it results in something you don't want or it hurts others.
Marg, you really need to clean your spiritual/emotional/psychological mirror.
The fact of the matter is that your posts to most everyone on this board either stems from jealousy of some sort (as it is with Moniker), a need to undermine someone (like the post to keene on the sticky thread where you read his blog trying to find dirt), or an incessant demand that the whole world apologize to you for not bending over when you ask.
You can go and all but call someone a slut, and it's ok. But let someone point out your redundancy, let them point out where you are lying in claiming that you are being attacked, let them point out holes in your absentee friend's scholarship, let them do anything other than worship your grandoise ideas of intellectual superiority, and all of a sudden you experience the most palpable internet outrage imagineable.
If you really don't care about this board, why have you spent the past SEVERAL weeks complaining about a dead thread, why do you spend time trying to convince an intelligent woman that she's a slut (perhaps no one is looking at poor Marg???), and why do you keep coming back, again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again?
Each one has to find his peace from within. And peace to be real must be unaffected by outside circumstances. -Ghandi
Sam Harris wrote:Marg, you really need to clean your spiritual/emotional/psychological mirror.
The fact of the matter is that your posts to most everyone on this board either stems from jealousy of some sort (as it is with Moniker), a need to undermine someone (like the post to keene on the sticky thread where you read his blog trying to find dirt), or an incessant demand that the whole world apologize to you for not bending over when you ask.
My take on women and sexuality -- attention from men.
There are some women that are alpha females -- they do desire attention from all men, they enjoy taking sexual attention from husband's, boyfriends, essentially anyone to prop up their worth and decimate others. It may have as much to do with their lack of confidence or just as likely that they just enjoy hurting other women. These women will flirt intentionally with your husband right in front of you and don't even want your husband -- they just want you to know that they can have him. Power.
There are some women that want worth from men and seek it through intellectual pursuits. These women will latch on to men that they view as intelligent -- will seek approval from this man. They will criticize other women for their sexuality and tend to lessen any remarks by the other woman and try to shame them for being a sexual creature.
There are some women that are just women that are not ashamed of being a sexual creature, have intellectual pursuits, and have no deep seated desire to make other women feel like crap. I'm one of those, marg.
You often make remarks about other women on this website -- you've done so to KA, as well. You tiff tiff things said and wave other women off by saying essentially, "well you just use your looks/sexuality/whatever to get what you want" -- so what? Why do you care?
You told me I was obsessed with sex. You told Ren he had sexual fantasies about me. You told me that there is a correlation between me mentioning drugs in my past and desiring sexual attention. You told me saying I was single was desiring sexual attention.
How about this marg?
YOU desire your worth and merit through JAK. It's obvious you do so, and you are threatened by other women that get noticed by men and you have to turn the tables and shame the woman. You even told GoodK essentially that certain women he should stay away from. You DO judge women by drug use, lifestyle, etc... -- this was seen from your Jewish Princess comment. You hold a lot of deep seated animosity toward others, and their lifestyles and you're just the atheist version of Charity.
I don't care if you approve of me or what your take is on me. Yet, don't say stuff to me and not expect me to follow up and question you on it. You make generalizations and quite seriously assumed I was too dense or fragile to follow up with you.
YOU told Ren he had sexual fantasies about ME when we were discussing Dangers of Religion -- YOU think on that. WHO sees me as a sexual creature, marg? I wasn't even considering that. YOU were.
I also have seen plenty of your posts at the other forum you, JAK, and Jersey Girl post on. You attempt to paint yourself as someone intellectually superior and you then wallow in the mud with hateful, vile insults that look like they came from a crass, simple mind. You don't fool me.