A very big personal problem. advice please.

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_Dr. Shades
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Post by _Dr. Shades »

Are you planning on telling them that your testimony is almost dead too, or do they already know?
"Finally, for your rather strange idea that miracles are somehow linked to the amount of gay sexual gratification that is taking place would require that primitive Christianity was launched by gay sex, would it not?"

--Louis Midgley
_TygerFang
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Post by _TygerFang »

Gazelam wrote:Tyger,

don't worry about your sister knowing or not. If she dies before you say it, she'll know from the other side. She wont be that far away.

And again, put all this stuff off for a few years. At least 4.

Gaz

I thought I was going to put it off, but I don't believe in an afterlife and even if I did 2 years + the time it takes to move out isn't going to work with how things are happening. My sister asks once or twice a week if I still believe in the church, and as I said before things are getting more and more strained as more time passes. I don't think I deserve that and my family doesn't deserve to live like that. My family also doesn't deserve to learn that I've been flat out lying to them and keeping my life from them, even if I am justified. I don't want them to disown me or anything, and if I go on for even longer than I have I just make it more and more likely that they will. (especially if I'm moved out, it's impossible to disown me without kicking me out and it's not as hard to tell them if I don't also have to tell them I've been keeping this from them for years)

EDIT: didn't see your post Shades, no I didn't tell them yet. and I'll pretty much have to tell them when I tell them about being gay.... *sigh* life's really gotten too complicated for my liking.
_Jersey Girl
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Post by _Jersey Girl »

Tyger,

I have a concern about you telling your sister. If you haven't already spoken to your folks this evening, could you consider putting the brakes on and thinking more about why you want to tell your sister and the possible impact it will have on her as she faces surgery? Could we talk that part out with you?

Jersey Girl
Failure is not falling down but refusing to get up.
Chinese Proverb
_TygerFang
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Post by _TygerFang »

Jersey Girl wrote:Tyger,

I have a concern about you telling your sister. If you haven't already spoken to your folks this evening, could you consider putting the brakes on and thinking more about why you want to tell your sister and the possible impact it will have on her as she faces surgery? Could we talk that part out with you?

Jersey Girl

I haven't talked to them yet. And truthfully, my sister and I are close. She's the one who like to be crazy and tease me. I really just don't want to have to lie to her, especially if it's the last thing she'll know about me... She's the one I worry about, but for a different reason than my parents. It'll be hard for her to accept, she'll be sad and she might even get angry. But I think that she's the one that I'd never expect to just give up on me... my parents are the ones I'm worried about and my brother.

I think the only reason she'll have a hard time accepting it is because of how much she believes in the church, I think otherwise she'd be accepting. She's the kind of person that'll get really angry at you but could never hold that anger for more than 5 minutes.
_Jersey Girl
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Post by _Jersey Girl »

TygerFang wrote:
Jersey Girl wrote:Tyger,

I have a concern about you telling your sister. If you haven't already spoken to your folks this evening, could you consider putting the brakes on and thinking more about why you want to tell your sister and the possible impact it will have on her as she faces surgery? Could we talk that part out with you?

Jersey Girl

I haven't talked to them yet. And truthfully, my sister and I are close. She's the one who like to be crazy and tease me. I really just don't want to have to lie to her, especially if it's the last thing she'll know about me... She's the one I worry about, but for a different reason than my parents. It'll be hard for her to accept, she'll be sad and she might even get angry. But I think that she's the one that I'd never expect to just give up on me... my parents are the ones I'm worried about and my brother.

I think the only reason she'll have a hard time accepting it is because of how much she believes in the church, I think otherwise she'd be accepting. She's the kind of person that'll get really angry at you but could never hold that anger for more than 5 minutes.


Tyger...I raised a couple or three issues with you in chat...I hope you'll consider putting your decision on 24 hour hold and think about those possibilities.
Failure is not falling down but refusing to get up.
Chinese Proverb
_Always Thinking
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Post by _Always Thinking »

The OP makes a lot more sense once you realize that she is female. LOL
_Gazelam
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Post by _Gazelam »

Tyger,

Find a personal temple type space where you can offer up a vocal prayerwithout anyone bothering you. If your testimony is troubleing you the only way your going to be able to fix it is with prayer.

Enos 1:4

Gaz
We can easily forgive a child who is afraid of the dark; the real tragedy of life is when men are afraid of the light. - Plato
_Boaz & Lidia
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Post by _Boaz & Lidia »

Gazelam wrote:
Once you're in college, and out on your own, you will be able to experiment as far as dating women as well as men, and decide what really appeals to you without feeling like someone is looking over your shoulder.


What the Hell Liz !!!
Hand her a towel and tell her to dry off!
_Angus McAwesome
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Post by _Angus McAwesome »

Tyger, not to belittle your situation at all, because I'm sure to you it's like totally end of the world and oh my god the angst is killing you...

But you're 16 going on 17. Not exactly at the point one can term as emotionally or even sexually mature except in purely biological terms. It's a little early yet for you to be applying to Sapphic Sisterhood. Now if you were say, 20 and had already had sex with a man and with a woman, had found that you prefer women over men I might be inclined to call the Dykes Local 167 and tell them they need to send you a complimentary flannel shirt and matching Birkenstocks. But you're not, so I won't.

Give it a few years is what I'm saying. At least wait until your 18, have moved out of mom and dad's house, and have means of supporting yourself independantly before hoisting the Jolly Susan and going to your parents to proclaim you're gay.
I was afraid of the dark when I was young. "Don't be afraid, my son," my mother would always say. "The child-eating night goblins can smell fear." Bitch... - Kreepy Kat
_Boaz & Lidia
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Post by _Boaz & Lidia »

TF,

Have you had any homosexual experiences?

IF not, then you are not a sinner, at least according to the leadership of LDS Inc.

Just tell your family that you WANT to be a lesbian.

IF you have had homosexual experiences already, then you are a lesbian.

Wait til you are 18, them move out of Zion's camp.
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