Mothers in Zion - why they're leaving

[Marcus]

Philo, this link is blowing up today among LDS women. It’s directly related to the themes in the OP.

https://homeculture.substack.com/p/altar-bound-79c

No surprise. This was heartbreaking to read:

...The LDS Church contributed $250 million to the fund created to pay out claims for BSA victims. Erin Alberty reported on the the LDS church’s original settlement offer, which included ”the condition that former Scouts who were abused couldn't sue the church separately over incidents that occurred outside of Scouting activities. The church argued that $250 million was enough to cover abuse both in scouting and in other church settings.”

Many analysts felt the condition simply required the abuser to have participated in scouts at one point ever for their abuse to be covered by the $250 million. People outside of the church might not understand how sweeping that made the condition.

Much of scout leadership was considered a calling in the LDS Church. A calling is a volunteer role a Bishop asks a member to take on. Members are expected to accept callings. Because of this a huge percentage of American LDS men served in Boy Scouts at one point or another. And almost all US-based LDS boys were Boy Scouts, they were enrolled by the Church as soon as they turned eight. So while this settlement condition wouldn’t have granted the church complete immunity from CSA lawsuits, it would have come pretty close.

The bankruptcy judge rejected the condition....

That the LDS church tried to negotiate for something like that is beyond sickening.

[Jersey Girl]

Yeah, Marcus and Jersey Girl are rock stars in their own rights. To be able to work so hard and then win the lives they desired to live, it's pure fiction for most people. Tip o' the hat to them.

- Doc

Thank you. Let's not forget Stay At Home Moms (SAHMs). I spent 10 years as a SAHM and I can tell you that although it is worthy work, it's often work that goes unnoticed when SAHMs are often wearing multiple hats when taking care of their family and home. I'm sure you can list them such as nurse, teacher, house keeper, personal shopper, meal planner, cook, accountant...etc.

You don't have much if any contact with your colleagues and so it's also very isolating work. As a SAHM you have got to have a lot of internal strength, dedication, and find contentment in accomplishments that when achieved, no one is giving you an award or a pay increase. And regular breaks throughout your day of total service? That doesn't happen. An uninterrupted bath or shower? I laugh in your face!

One day when our kids were preschool and toddler age, the Boy made a statement to the effect "You sit home all day". I started the speech that parenting and homemaking isn't a "sit down" job but then I got another idea driven by my hurt and anger.

The next day when he came home, he had to push toys away to get in the front door. Toys and books, puzzle pieces, strewn from one end of the house to the other and pieces of clothing scattered in between right where they were dropped. Dishwasher full, more dishes and pots and pans in the sink. Toilet paper pieces all over the floor of the bathrooms. Smeary finger prints on the sliding glass doors. The worst was probably the dining area.The plastic shower curtain that I kept under the high chair was caked with dried food. The high chair seat and tray, the suction cup dish on the tray with the spoon, the hardwood floor, and the wall were all covered with dried food and spilled milk, juice, and water. Left over sippy cup on the floor leaking milk right where it was dropped.

He said, "What the hell happened here?" to which I replied, "I sat home".

[Dr. Shades]

The next day when he came home, he had to push toys away to get in the front door. Toys and books, puzzle pieces, strewn from one end of the house to the other and pieces of clothing scattered in between right where they were dropped. Dishwasher full, more dishes and pots and pans in the sink. Toilet paper pieces all over the floor of the bathrooms. Smeary finger prints on the sliding glass doors. The worst was probably the dining area.The plastic shower curtain that I kept under the high chair was caked with dried food. The high chair seat and tray, the suction cup dish on the tray with the spoon, the hardwood floor, and the wall were all covered with dried food and spilled milk, juice, and water. Left over sippy cup on the floor leaking milk right where it was dropped.

This is why I never reproduced.

[Jersey Girl]

Yeah, Marcus and Jersey Girl are rock stars in their own rights. To be able to work so hard and then win the lives they desired to live, it's pure fiction for most people. Tip o' the hat to them.

- Doc

Amen.

Thank you. I'm not particularly good at handling compliments so let me add msnobody to the list of women who worked hard while raising children to achieve a career that benefits us all. I know something about her professional development and I can tell you, it came from climbing a mountain of hard work and dedication.

Of course women can choose if they want to raise a family or not, have a career or not, or have both if desired. I think it's all hard work no matter what path you choose or how many paths you choose over the course of a life time.

The thing is though, with regard to LDS women, it's one thing to have a sacrificial heart. It's a whole other thing when the result is neglect, lip service, and downgrading by the very institution that claims to value you. It's reassuring to read the conversation highlights that Dr. Moore posted. It sounds like there is a kind of grass roots protest taking place where women are voting with their feet and effectively saying, "I matter".

Because they do.

[Jersey Girl]

The next day when he came home, he had to push toys away to get in the front door. Toys and books, puzzle pieces, strewn from one end of the house to the other and pieces of clothing scattered in between right where they were dropped. Dishwasher full, more dishes and pots and pans in the sink. Toilet paper pieces all over the floor of the bathrooms. Smeary finger prints on the sliding glass doors. The worst was probably the dining area.The plastic shower curtain that I kept under the high chair was caked with dried food. The high chair seat and tray, the suction cup dish on the tray with the spoon, the hardwood floor, and the wall were all covered with dried food and spilled milk, juice, and water. Left over sippy cup on the floor leaking milk right where it was dropped.

This is why I never reproduced.

What you have an aversion to dried sweet potatoes stuck to the wall*?

*and on the floor, and on the table, and on the baby from their legs to their tummy, in their diaper, and in their hair?

[Marcus]

The next day when he came home, he had to push toys away to get in the front door. Toys and books, puzzle pieces, strewn from one end of the house to the other and pieces of clothing scattered in between right where they were dropped. Dishwasher full, more dishes and pots and pans in the sink. Toilet paper pieces all over the floor of the bathrooms. Smeary finger prints on the sliding glass doors. The worst was probably the dining area.The plastic shower curtain that I kept under the high chair was caked with dried food. The high chair seat and tray, the suction cup dish on the tray with the spoon, the hardwood floor, and the wall were all covered with dried food and spilled milk, juice, and water. Left over sippy cup on the floor leaking milk right where it was dropped.

This is why I never reproduced.

You missed her point entirely.

[Jersey Girl]

This is why I never reproduced.

You missed her point entirely.

Woosh!

[Philo Sofee]

Yeah, Marcus and Jersey Girl are rock stars in their own rights. To be able to work so hard and then win the lives they desired to live, it's pure fiction for most people. Tip o' the hat to them.

- Doc

Thank you. Let's not forget Stay At Home Moms (SAHMs). I spent 10 years as a SAHM and I can tell you that although it is worthy work, it's often work that goes unnoticed when SAHMs are often wearing multiple hats when taking care of their family and home. I'm sure you can list them such as nurse, teacher, house keeper, personal shopper, meal planner, cook, accountant...etc.

You don't have much if any contact with your colleagues and so it's also very isolating work. As a SAHM you have got to have a lot of internal strength, dedication, and find contentment in accomplishments that when achieved, no one is giving you an award or a pay increase. And regular breaks throughout your day of total service? That doesn't happen. An uninterrupted bath or shower? I laugh in your face!

One day when our kids were preschool and toddler age, the Boy made a statement to the effect "You sit home all day". I started the speech that parenting and homemaking isn't a "sit down" job but then I got another idea driven by my hurt and anger.

The next day when he came home, he had to push toys away to get in the front door. Toys and books, puzzle pieces, strewn from one end of the house to the other and pieces of clothing scattered in between right where they were dropped. Dishwasher full, more dishes and pots and pans in the sink. Toilet paper pieces all over the floor of the bathrooms. Smeary finger prints on the sliding glass doors. The worst was probably the dining area.The plastic shower curtain that I kept under the high chair was caked with dried food. The high chair seat and tray, the suction cup dish on the tray with the spoon, the hardwood floor, and the wall were all covered with dried food and spilled milk, juice, and water. Left over sippy cup on the floor leaking milk right where it was dropped.

He said, "What the hell happened here?" to which I replied, "I sat home".

OMG, PLESE MAY I USE THIS AS AN ILLUSTRATION ON MY SHOW SUNDAY? This is spectacular.

[Jersey Girl]

Thank you. Let's not forget Stay At Home Moms (SAHMs). I spent 10 years as a SAHM and I can tell you that although it is worthy work, it's often work that goes unnoticed when SAHMs are often wearing multiple hats when taking care of their family and home. I'm sure you can list them such as nurse, teacher, house keeper, personal shopper, meal planner, cook, accountant...etc.

You don't have much if any contact with your colleagues and so it's also very isolating work. As a SAHM you have got to have a lot of internal strength, dedication, and find contentment in accomplishments that when achieved, no one is giving you an award or a pay increase. And regular breaks throughout your day of total service? That doesn't happen. An uninterrupted bath or shower? I laugh in your face!

One day when our kids were preschool and toddler age, the Boy made a statement to the effect "You sit home all day". I started the speech that parenting and homemaking isn't a "sit down" job but then I got another idea driven by my hurt and anger.

The next day when he came home, he had to push toys away to get in the front door. Toys and books, puzzle pieces, strewn from one end of the house to the other and pieces of clothing scattered in between right where they were dropped. Dishwasher full, more dishes and pots and pans in the sink. Toilet paper pieces all over the floor of the bathrooms. Smeary finger prints on the sliding glass doors. The worst was probably the dining area.The plastic shower curtain that I kept under the high chair was caked with dried food. The high chair seat and tray, the suction cup dish on the tray with the spoon, the hardwood floor, and the wall were all covered with dried food and spilled milk, juice, and water. Left over sippy cup on the floor leaking milk right where it was dropped.

He said, "What the hell happened here?" to which I replied, "I sat home".

OMG, PLESE MAY I USE THIS AS AN ILLUSTRATION ON MY SHOW SUNDAY? This is spectacular.

Change "the Boy" to "my husband", don't use my screen name or real name, and it's yours for the taking.

[Philo Sofee]

OMG, PLESE MAY I USE THIS AS AN ILLUSTRATION ON MY SHOW SUNDAY? This is spectacular.

Change "the Boy" to "my husband", don't use my screen name or real name, and it's yours for the taking.

OK, thank you so much!