12 percent of people report having no friends

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Res Ipsa
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Re: 12 percent of people report having no friends

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doubtingthomas wrote:
Fri Nov 11, 2022 10:04 pm
Res Ipsa wrote:
Fri Nov 11, 2022 5:26 pm
The more I think about the article linked in the opening post, the more I wonder about the impact of changes to people's definitions of "friend" or "close friend" over time. I think that may be particularly true with friendships between and among men. One of the people in the article quoted at the beginning of the first thread on this topic said:

I didn't share the article again because someone here accuses me of sexism.

Marcus wrote:
Fri Nov 11, 2022 1:26 am
...)
Right?
Why would you let Marcus decide what you do and do not post?
he/him
we all just have to live through it,
holding each other’s hands.


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Re: 12 percent of people report having no friends

Post by Res Ipsa »

doubtingthomas wrote:
Fri Nov 11, 2022 10:10 pm
Doctor Steuss wrote:
Fri Nov 11, 2022 8:11 pm
I'm sorry you've known this, but immensely grateful it's (hopefully forever) in the past.
It's predictable, I doubt most people here have a lot of close friends.
Why do you think that?
he/him
we all just have to live through it,
holding each other’s hands.


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Re: 12 percent of people report having no friends

Post by Doctor CamNC4Me »

Res Ipsa wrote:
Sat Nov 12, 2022 3:43 pm
doubtingthomas wrote:
Fri Nov 11, 2022 10:10 pm
It's predictable, I doubt most people here have a lot of close friends.
Why do you think that?
I think DT should join a gaming guild. My Navy kid and her fiancé are big time gamers, especially with regard to D&D (she’s been DM’ing for a while now) - the have a room solely dedicated to all their gaming toys, computers, etc. To whit, they have a LOT of friends and are surrounded by generally positive-minded people. I’m happy for them even though gaming and whatnot isn’t my cup of tea. I suspect she’d lose her mind if I got into it, but I’m just not engineered that way even though I used to game as a kid.

Anyway, DT. Go play. It’ll be good for you. Just be nice and decent and you’ll have a dozen friends instantly.

- Doc
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Re: 12 percent of people report having no friends

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Doctor CamNC4Me wrote:
Sat Nov 12, 2022 4:38 pm
Res Ipsa wrote:
Sat Nov 12, 2022 3:43 pm


Why do you think that?
I think DT should join a gaming guild. My Navy kid and her fiancé are big time gamers, especially with regard to D&D (she’s been DM’ing for a while now) - the have a room solely dedicated to all their gaming toys, computers, etc. To whit, they have a LOT of friends and are surrounded by generally positive-minded people. I’m happy for them even though gaming and whatnot isn’t my cup of tea. I suspect she’d lose her mind if I got into it, but I’m just not engineered that way even though I used to game as a kid.

Anyway, DT. Go play. It’ll be good for you. Just be nice and decent and you’ll have a dozen friends instantly.

- Doc
I think that's good advice, Doc. I have a large circle of friends built around gaming, both boardgames and RPGs. These days, there are tons of gaming venues, and there are lots of folks who are happy to bring newcomers into the gaming community. I helped my good friend who owns the board gaming pub I hang out at host boardgames at a charity fund-raising event at a local climbing gym this week. It was a blast teaching games to people whose gaming experience ranged from Uno to Wingspan. Gaming is an inherently social activity that attracts lots of different folks.
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holding each other’s hands.


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Re: 12 percent of people report having no friends

Post by doubtingthomas »

Res Ipsa wrote:
Sat Nov 12, 2022 3:43 pm

Why would you let Marcus decide what you do and do not post?
I honestly don't care what Kate Kelly says about me :D

I just don't want the thread the derail.
"I have the type of (REAL) job where I can choose how to spend my time," says Marcus. :roll:
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Re: 12 percent of people report having no friends

Post by doubtingthomas »

Res Ipsa wrote:
Sat Nov 12, 2022 3:34 pm
doubtingthomas wrote:
Fri Nov 11, 2022 9:57 pm
Well, I'm not resentful or bitter.
Good. I'm glad to hear that.
Thank you.
"I have the type of (REAL) job where I can choose how to spend my time," says Marcus. :roll:
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Re: 12 percent of people report having no friends

Post by doubtingthomas »

Res Ipsa wrote:
Sat Nov 12, 2022 3:39 pm
doubtingthomas wrote:
Fri Nov 11, 2022 10:01 pm
I think loneliness is when you don't feel a connection with the people you want to be with.
That's an interesting way of describing loneliness. For me, it was not recognizing the connections I had with the people I was with. I think mine was driven strongly by depression. Depression is a liar. Among the things it lied to me about was that no one could understand what I was feeling. The result was that I literally couldn't see the connections that I had or understand that my experience was much more common than my depression was telling me.
It is very common. I hope you are much better now.

Was that long ago?
"I have the type of (REAL) job where I can choose how to spend my time," says Marcus. :roll:
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Re: 12 percent of people report having no friends

Post by doubtingthomas »

Res Ipsa wrote:
Sat Nov 12, 2022 3:39 pm
That's an interesting way of describing loneliness.
You can have a lot of good friends, but you'll still feel lonely if you don't care about them. It's a sad truth.

We need to feel a connection with the people we care about.
Last edited by doubtingthomas on Sat Nov 12, 2022 7:32 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: 12 percent of people report having no friends

Post by doubtingthomas »

Doctor CamNC4Me wrote:
Sat Nov 12, 2022 4:38 pm
Anyway, DT. Go play. It’ll be good for you. Just be nice and decent and you’ll have a dozen friends instantly.

- Doc
Yea, I plan to in the future, I used to love the Xbox Live.
"I have the type of (REAL) job where I can choose how to spend my time," says Marcus. :roll:
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Re: 12 percent of people report having no friends

Post by doubtingthomas »

Doctor Steuss wrote:
Fri Nov 11, 2022 11:20 pm
I realize that online interactions are extremely limited in what we "see" of people, but I find 99% people who post here to be incredibly interesting, insightful, and enjoyable to interact with. So many moments I have found myself grateful for an interaction, or comment, with/by someone here.
There are probably only a handful that I wouldn't eagerly take up on an offer for lunch/dinner (no, I won't name the handful that I wouldn't), and I am all but certain that I would enjoy myself immensely in doing so. I'd dare to say that for a lot of people here, if I were to find out they passed away, I would genuinely mourn and feel a deep sense of loss -- and not the "I feel bad for their family," kind, but the incredibly selfish "I feel bad for myself that I don't get to have them in my life anymore."
That's a good thing to say. That means we are all friends here.

You should organize an activity someday, for those who can travel.
"I have the type of (REAL) job where I can choose how to spend my time," says Marcus. :roll:
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